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Critical Analysis #1
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amigo
Senior Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 520
the earth school

0 posted 2001-11-15 04:00 PM


Hope not to hide;
Step in to slide;
Remember to forget darkness;
Awaken those dreams asleep;
Watch them rebuild our new safe world


© Copyright 2001 amigo - All Rights Reserved
dreamer1 12 5 24
Member
since 2000-12-11
Posts 150
crossing between
1 posted 2001-11-16 10:37 PM


amigo, I like your use of words, the poem is short, but it says much. I would have to disagree with the last part of the following line

"Watch them rebuild our new safe world"

I don't think we have a safe world, but then, I have a warped view of everything.

Thanks for the read.

dreamer

The day is brighter, but the dawn is sweetest.

-Stacey Leonard

amigo
Senior Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 520
the earth school
2 posted 2001-11-17 01:22 PM


thank you, dreamer for your words...about the last line...our dreams have to rebuild a 'new' safe world...not 'safe' before the tragic events...the parameters for'safe' are to be changed...what do you say?


thank you again,
amigo

hush
Senior Member
since 2001-05-27
Posts 1653
Ohio, USA
3 posted 2001-11-19 11:19 PM


I didn't get too much out of this, I think it's a bit too vague.

'Hope not to hide;'

Is this imperitive, or narrative? Is the unspoken pronoun the understood 'you' or an 'I' left off for emphasis? Hope not to hide what? Hide it where? Why not?

'Step in to slide;'

This answers even less while provoking more questions.

'Remember to forget darkness;'

This is cliche...

'Awaken those dreams asleep;
Watch them rebuild our new safe world'

I don't really get it... I'm confused... add some detail, I'll understand mroe.


"this is not who I meant to be
this is not how I meant to feel" -Ani DiFranco

amigo
Senior Member
since 2001-10-12
Posts 520
the earth school
4 posted 2001-11-28 12:24 PM


hush - thanks for stopping by and expressing yourself...now,

hope not to hide - that's for all who hope to hide behind veil of fear, doubts etc., in today's world

step in to slide - muster up your courage, jump in and flow with the tides...ups and downs are normal and needed

just don't forget darkness...but make it a point to remember to forget, lest it may pop up again and again

awaken those dreams for ourselves...not sitting back waiting for 'normalcy' to return...dream and believe...a new safe world will be born.

hope it makes a wee bit sense.


luv & peace,
amigo


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