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Critical Analysis #1
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mere enigma
Junior Member
since 2001-01-29
Posts 18


0 posted 2001-02-03 03:05 AM


Sand
I first smelled it fourteen years ago
When I stepped into the muted landscape
of browns, tans, beiges (never whites)
and sullen gray skies (never blue)
Inhaled it into my being
breathed, slept, and ate it
At first it was a novelty
To step into the oven every day
Feel the boiling wind on my face
(the Bedouins have a name for it, I think)
And feel my eyes shrink and lips wither

It became a familiar burden
A symbol of conformity and infinity
Drifting into piles in my mind
Slowly covering my memories
of green and white and blue
(Of grass and snow and sky)
Obscuring my colors, clogging my pen
My only comfort
came on the hazy days
when it hung motionless in the sky
and sheltered me from pummeling heat
Or the times when it swirled in fury
and blew into every corner of my life
Then I knew the desert had never been conquered
And that we really had no business
being there


Seven years times two
Each seven years we are built anew
I guess I must be completely composed
of harsh dry wind
windswept roads
colorless memories
thorny stunted trees
and beige and brown and tan
Sand


[This message has been edited by mere enigma (edited 02-03-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Mere Enigma - All Rights Reserved
warmhrt
Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563

1 posted 2001-02-04 09:41 AM


I found this to be a unique look at life in the desert...

You captured well the look and feel, even the taste of the sand. My only suggestion would be to expand upon your own emotions already stated...or to focus on how the desert is  continuous evolving, yet staying the same.

I enjoyed reading,
Kris

"It is wisdom to know others;
It is enlightenment to know one's self" - Lao Tzu

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