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Critical Analysis #1
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The demon...
| Critical Analysis #1 |
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The demon... |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA 
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The demon on my shoulder said it best,-- “The grass is greener when the grass is smoked, It doesn’t matter on which path you walked, All roads will lead to Rome, both east and west... Remember that three lefts will make a right! That curiosity gave cats a life worth living Don’t read the books, their context is deceiving, Judge by the cover and you’ll be alright! Remember that nobody wins in peace! Thus start the fights as often as you wish! Remember, worms will catch the early fish And that the second mouse gets the cheese. For every penny saved a second’s lost... If time is money, -- do not sell it short! Don’t sell your soul for pennies to the Lord-- The Devil buys it at a higher cost.” |
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| © Copyright 2000 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Janie Member
since 2000-08-13
Posts 158 |
Interesting parallelisms. Clever. How true that the devil does buy souls at a high price, a price so high there's only one can afford to pay, one who has already paid and is standing by with checkbook in hand and will pay for as many as will ask. < !signature--> [This message has been edited by Janie (edited 08-21-2000).] |
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Elyse Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 414Apex (think raleigh) NC |
hi master! i love your first two lines. gave me a chuckle  the only thing i have to add, is your rhyme is a little all over the place. in almost all the stanzas the first and last lines rhyme, but the middle lines rhyme sometimes with themselves, sometimes with the first and last and sometimes not at all. i think the way it is is a bit distracting. try to see if you can even it out some. or, ya know, ignore me  luv Elyse |
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Elyse Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 414Apex (think raleigh) NC |
hi master! i love your first two lines. gave me a chuckle the only thing i have to add, is your rhyme is a little all over the place. in almost all the stanzas the first and last lines rhyme, but the middle lines rhyme sometimes with themselves, sometimes with the first and last and sometimes not at all. i think the way it is is a bit distracting. try to see if you can even it out some. or, ya know, ignore me luv Elyse |
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niky tamayo Junior Member
since 2000-08-22
Posts 17 |
yes! three lefts do make a right, and i don't give a darning needle for rhyming scheme. this is a perfectly wicked piece, and the double meaning of the last lines is perfectly subtle. |
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Brad Member Ascendant
since 1999-08-20
Posts 5705Jejudo, South Korea |
A clever trick that brought a smile to my face. Curious if that's all you wanted from this piece? Believe me, I do not intend everything I write to be the "great materpiece", the final, one moment for justifying my existence. Actually, I don't think anything I've done does that. Brad |
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Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Janie, thank you, I'm glad that you enjoyed this one... Elyse, the rhyme wasn't actually all over the place. It wasn't perfect, but if you look closer, you'll see common sounds in the end words... The rhyming pattern is ABBA. Niky, I'm glad you liked it... Brad, that's basically all I wanted to do with it... Most of my poems are really deep, thought-provoking, but as long as some of them bring a smile to people's faces, I'm happy. Check out my poetry here: http://cafepoetry.com/stage1/andrey_kneller.htm#My%20Hamlet |
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