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Critical Analysis #1
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JohnDLeclare
Junior Member
since 2000-07-26
Posts 43


0 posted 2000-08-02 06:46 AM


                            Reality
                                
                    The problem of illusion
                            Delusion
                           Collusion
                    With memories not real,
                                
                  Cause problems of confusion
                           contusions
                            Infusion
                     With people not real.
                                
                          The solution
                           Resolution
                            Defusion
                     Of self, into reality,
                                
                          Can destroy
                            The self
                     That I may wish to be.
                                
                          John D LeClare

© Copyright 2000 John Dale LeClare - All Rights Reserved
pegasus111
Member Elite
since 2000-07-27
Posts 2219
ocala, fl, usa
1 posted 2000-08-02 10:45 AM


John. I like the theme but not sure how some of the words fit.

the woods are lovely, dark, and deep, but I have promises to keep, and many miles to go before I sleep...Frost

jbouder
Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash
2 posted 2000-08-02 12:09 PM


John:

I had to think a little bit about this one to find an application for what you are saying.  The use of the word "contusions" hints at the suppressed memories of abuse.  Facing the possibility that such memories might be false runs the risk of shaking the identity of the person contemplating a "resolution" of self to reality.  I really cannot think of any other way for "contusions" to fit (this is not to say there are not other ways ... only that I could not think of another way).

You may want to clarify the theme a bit.  The easiest way to do this, I think, is to work on your title ... give us something to start with.  "Reality" is incredibly vague and your descriptions are not particularly vivid.

I do like the idea.  Thanks for the read.

Jim

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