Critical Analysis #1 |
The fall fell into puddles... |
Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
The fall fell into puddles and reflected Right through the cloud’s swaying tides, It resurrected to new heights And in the lucid, shinning lights, It dimly glimmered in the nights While grimly gazing on the earth, -- There... unexpected, A tempest rose so full of verve! And lightning with extensive strides Skipped flights of stairs And struck with stripes of blaring glares-- So scarcely scattered. And only battered trees objected But ineffectively!-- Defected, The frail trees, deprived of pride, Had set their final leaves in flight, -- And stood exposed and unprotected. The television diagnosed A coming calm, But I envisioned The grace and power of the storm, -- I was effected by the fall I fell in love, -- I resurrected! [This message has been edited by Master (edited 06-06-2000).] |
||
© Copyright 2000 Andrey Kneller - All Rights Reserved | |||
peppermint35 Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106Texas, USA |
I get to be the first to respond to this!!!! Amazing. I really thought it flowed well.... the language was excellent... and it had the exact right tempo. Something about storms is so appealing to me and somehow you have captured that feeling. |
||
Elyse Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 414Apex (think raleigh) NC |
hi master! this is absoluetly completely lovely! i cant beleive there arent tons of postings saying so. i LOVE the title "And grimly sighted on the earth" i assume this is a typo, meant to be sighed? the way you talk about the lightning is really great, fresh, amazing word choice. anyway, i have no suggestions, i just had to come and pile on the praise and tell you how wonderful this is luv Elyse Do I contradict myself? Very well then . . . . I contradict myself; I am large . . . . I contain multitudes. -Papa Walt |
||
Master Senior Member
since 1999-08-18
Posts 1867Boston, MA |
Thank you both, I'm glad that you enjoyed this one... I love this style, when you mix rhyme with alliteration, usually the flow of the poem becomes excellent... Thanks again! |
||
⇧ top of page ⇧ | ||
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. |