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Critical Analysis #1
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For Sam
| Critical Analysis #1 |
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For Sam |
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Kirsty24 Junior Member
since 2000-03-24
Posts 40Australia |
We met so long ago now I can't remember when We become good friends And have learnt alot since then We have often wondered, What more of it is to come? What more can we be but friends? Now all is said and done It has taken so long to get here And yet there is still so far to go To actually see you face to face Until then we wont know. I have dreamt of all the ways That things can possibly be There is one I always come back to It always ends with just me We meet under the moon lit sky The stars shine our way But with all the things we know There is nothing left to say You turn your back to me And slowly walk away But the thing you will never know Sam Is that I live on to see another day The words now remain unspoken There is love we will never share But never forget this one thing I will always care |
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| © Copyright 2000 Kirsty O'Hara - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sudhir Iyer Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943Mumbai, India : now in Belgium |
Kristy, I feel the poem is quite a great collection of thoughts. Very tight in flow. But if I may, I would like to be a bit critical here. First line - We met so long ago now "now" does not fit in the scheme of things of the past. Punctuations need a bit of a look in. I liked the punch line at the end - But never forget this one thing I will always care Nice poem, hope to see more from you. regards- sudhir Take each day as it comes, Consider each day as a flight, Try hard to succeed and fly, Surely then you will reach some height. But if by some chance you don’t, Remember that tomorrow will always come. Learn this well and learn this hard That today’s efforts will pay for tomorrow’s fun. A Crazy Monster, a.k.a Ski |
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Kirsty24 Junior Member
since 2000-03-24
Posts 40Australia |
Sudhir, Thanks for your comment, and only so soon after I had posted...  Amazingly I had the courage to send the poem to the person that it was about and he thought that it was nice. I suppose that is the main thing right??? Anyway thanks :R |
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