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Critical Analysis #1
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ghirgag
Junior Member
since 2000-04-26
Posts 11


0 posted 2000-04-27 01:58 PM


We’re never satisfied
with what we have.
Craving something new
contents us
for only minutes.
Then, we are always looking
for new emotions.
But someone needs
“ Just water”


© Copyright 2000 ghirgag - All Rights Reserved
jbouder
Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash
1 posted 2000-04-27 10:17 PM


ghirgag:

I liked the simplicity and directness of this one almost as much as your first post.  My only criticism (and I suppose it really isn't much of a criticism) is that the poem sounds much like a proverb and doesn't make the usual use of figurative language that is common in poetry.

For your next one you might consider playing around with some metaphor, symbolism, etc.  I think you will be pleased with the result.  Thanks again for posting.

Jim

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