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Kenneth Ray Taylor
Member
since 1999-11-11
Posts 139
Duluth, Minnesota, USA

0 posted 1999-12-15 02:03 PM


Lonely as I Was

Lonely as I was,
around any girl who paid me slightest heed
I built mythology.

If she was good,
......she was the personification of every virtue.
If evil,
......the perfection of redemption.
After all, didn't both the Virgin
and Magdalene
share a common name?

But when "God's plan" as I perceived it
fell apart,
so collapsed my universe.

How limited, how prone to err
was this god of my inventing,
who constantly granted me signs
to prove beyond a doubt
what I thought I already knew inside.

I knew so much back then.
But now I know so little.
Almost nothing, save this truth:
"One cannot possibly 'know' a thing
except it first be true."
And so very little is true.


© Copyright 1999 Kenneth Ray Taylor - All Rights Reserved
poetry_kills
Senior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 549
new orleans
1 posted 1999-12-15 03:31 PM


kenneth ~ i love this poem... i dont believe i'd read this one previous to now, so these are my first-impression comments... i am certain that i dont understand the poem the way you (the author) do, but it does hold a great deal of meaning for me... the blend of nihlism and faith in God is very eloquently and respectfully presented... personally i agree with the one thing that you claim to understand and i feel that this poem presents the idea very cleverly as the reader can almost see the progression of each thought leading to the final conclusion... first with the presentation of absolutes, either good or bad, then with self-justification and finally with a breaking down of false perceptions and the realization of lack of true understanding... i'm rambling, but all of this is just to say that i can identify on a very deep and very personal level with this poem...

sincerely,
**jerome the boy with no brain

jbouder
Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534
Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash
2 posted 1999-12-15 04:47 PM


Kenneth:

I have read this several times while trying to decide how it is to be interpreted.  My first impression was to interpret it narrowly, as it applied to placing a lover on a pedestal, and blinding one's self to the truth that love was not being returned.  After reading it a couple more times I began to think that maybe you intended the broader interpretation, the quotation at the end being a moral rather than a truth applied to this situation.  Enlighten me, please!

I enjoyed your poem a great deal (even though it caused me to beat myself up trying to decide how to understand it).  Whether it is a lesson on relationships or a lesson on life in general, I thought that it was very well done.

 Jim

"If I rest, I rust." - Martin Luther


Songbird
Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184
Missouri
3 posted 1999-12-16 09:06 PM


I really like this poems, please keep writing.
Kenneth Ray Taylor
Member
since 1999-11-11
Posts 139
Duluth, Minnesota, USA
4 posted 1999-12-17 04:59 AM


Thank you all,
I wrote this poem while observing someone I know who is my age (mid-forties) going through the painful experience of unrequited love.  This was a completely new experience for him.  Women have always thrown themselves at him, but not this time.  He was convinced both that this woman was really in love with him and that it was all part of God's master plan.  He felt God was constantly confirming these "facts" for him with amazing coincidences that would have amazed no  disinterested observer.  I could see so much of myself in him.  He was going through the same reconciliations with reality that I had to face 20 years before. To answer your question, Jim, the poem wasn't written with any deeper meaning than an expression of how experience alters our sense of reality.

Not A Poet
Member Elite
since 1999-11-03
Posts 3885
Oklahoma, USA
5 posted 1999-12-17 10:11 AM


After reading your explanation, the poem now makes perfectly good sense. Before the explanation, I had an entirely different interpretation. I guess I need to study more   Actually, I like both interpretations.
leon
Junior Member
since 1999-12-13
Posts 23

6 posted 1999-12-17 01:31 PM


I enjoyed the poem, not only because it's written very well, but because it strikes the heart and conscience with truism. Thanks for the read.

Sincerely
Leon

roxane
Senior Member
since 1999-09-02
Posts 505
us
7 posted 1999-12-18 04:13 PM


kenneth- i can relate to this poem!!!!   once i knew this guy who i was absolutely infatuated with, and i happened to notice that we had the exact same number of letters in our names:22.  then on febuary 22, (sad i remember the day   )  he sort of made a move like he liked me, and i did nothing short of pledge allegiance to the numeral 22.  he never knew, but i spent a whole lot of time trying to find bizaare parallels that i could say meant we were destined for each other.... obsession, basically.  but that was some time ago.  excellent poem, thought provoking....  i especially liked this part
Lonely as I was,
around any girl who paid me slightest heed
I built mythology.

If she was good,
......she was the personification of every virtue.
If evil,
......the perfection of redemption.
After all, didn't both the Virgin
and Magdalene
share a common name?

excellent, almost witty, instead of profound

Brad
Member Ascendant
since 1999-08-20
Posts 5705
Jejudo, South Korea
8 posted 1999-12-27 03:36 AM


I like the first part of this poem but I think the end came off a little too philosophical for my taste.  Stay in the image or the story and let the readers figure out all that stuff about 'truth'.  Actually, my own personal belief is that profundity almost never comes from 'profound' words but from description and extrapolation from the everyday things that we see, feel, experience and think about.  Experience  does alter out sense of reality and I always find it interesting that so many people find that 'truth' so disconcerting. I think it's a problem of essentialization -- there has to be some essence, something to hold on to, some type of foundation or we feel lost.  Aren't we all lost anyway?  

Both interpretations can be correct. I just thought I'd point out here that while a poet can shape a poem and control where the words go, he or she can never control the meaning of words themselves or of a poem itself completely.

Maybe I should go to the philosophy forum,
Brad  

Kenneth Ray Taylor
Member
since 1999-11-11
Posts 139
Duluth, Minnesota, USA
9 posted 1999-12-27 07:47 AM


Roxane, Thanks for the story. I think we all do the same dumb things.  Fortunately, the way life really turns out is in so many ways better than the way we plan it.  My ex-girlfriend and I planned to get married and have a daughter named Leah.  As it turned out we did.  We married two different people and each had a daughter named Leah.  (No connection, we just both liked the name.)  My family knows my ex-girlfriend, since she's still a friend of my sister's.  So I've often told my daughter, "Just think, if ----- and I had stuck together, you'd have red hair!"

Brad, I agree, and I thank you for the criticism.  Often it's important to say without saying.  I just got finished reading the Scarlet Letter, and I noticed a few odd things.  We are never told, what the scarlet letter "A" stands for.  Nor are we told what the relationship between Hester and Roger Chillingsworth is.  Nor are we ever told that the Rev. Mister Arthur Dimmesdale is the father of Hester's baby.  We are left to figure all of these things out.  None is ever stated.  As far as the scarlet letter itself, I believe it stands for "advoutry"--a wonderful word that I picked up in my Tyndale Bible, as in "Thou shalt not commit advoutry."

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