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Robin2
New Member
since 1999-08-17
Posts 5
UK

0 posted 1999-08-17 09:23 AM


A friend wrote to me and thanked me for reawakening her passion for writing poetry. In thinking about this, I came up with the following:

In Passion's Shade
Robin Laffan
August 1999
=============================================

Within the passion, dwells the risk,
A writhing serpent in a scented bush,
That strikes at you
As you pluck the bloom,
Its envenomed teeth biting deep
To draw the blood and raise the pain:
Fuel for your muse.

The pain will pass
While the venom lies
Hidden deep inside
Until a moment's doubt or fear
Brings it oozing forth once more
To chill the soul:
Breaking your hold on your dreams.

Seize that risk and surf its wave,
Ever slipping from its peak,
into a flight of spinning chance,
A whirling pool of what may be,
That falls towards you,
Seizing you in its hungry maw
To coalesce into the now
Leaving just a single thread:
The serpent tale of what has been.

Which even so
Casts a thousand twisting shadows,
In the turbulent lights of future times.
Shadows to be carved
With the passion and the muse
Into sculptures of words on the heart.


© Copyright 1999 Robin2 - All Rights Reserved
JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA
1 posted 1999-08-17 05:18 PM


Shadows to be carved....

wonderful!

------------------
Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
JP



Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 1999-08-17 05:37 PM


All I can say, Robin, is that I am so glad it is not painful for me to write. The only pain I suffer when I do put down words is sometimes getting the meaning across. In this matter, you did very well with your imagery.

------------------
Sunshine
Words will always express our feelings true. ~~~ KRJ
Look, then, into thine heart, and write ~~~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow



Robin2
New Member
since 1999-08-17
Posts 5
UK
3 posted 1999-08-18 05:30 AM


Thanks both.

It's not so much that it is painful to write, as that in writing, I find I am opening myself up to myself. I have to understand why I feel as well as what. In doing that, the doubt and the 'pain' come in. Learning to know myself, hasn't actually meant changing myself, just being more critical when I do what I do.
and much more self mocking.

Robin

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 1999-08-18 11:44 AM


I'm finding that writing about the painful happenings in my past is more of a catharsis, and it's doing wonders for my outlook. Keep posting.

------------------
Sunshine
Words will always express our feelings true. ~~~ KRJ
Look, then, into thine heart, and write ~~~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow



Skyfyre
Senior Member
since 1999-08-15
Posts 1906
Sitting in Michael's Lap
5 posted 1999-08-20 08:44 PM


The imagery in this piece was both delightful and inspired.

I might suggest that you throw some rhyme in, but I am afraid it will upset the diction ... leave it just as it is. Great work.

------------------
"Nunc lento sonitu dicunt, morierus"
(When I hear the bell tolling softly for another, it says to me, "Thou must die.")


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