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Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere

0 posted 2017-05-21 12:33 PM



I was feeling guilty
about sleeping
the day away…
even though
I knew it could not
have been any other way.
It was unrealistic of me
to entertain ideas
that somehow
I would rise above
those things
that bring me down
as long as he was ill.
I thought that some way,
as I focused on
someone other than me,
my gloom would dissipate.
But I found out
I couldn’t ignore
that my everything
I’ve built my life around
is in danger of dying.
The fear
that my foundation
was slowly crumbling away,
as the treatments turned him
into Mr. Hyde,
was relentless.
It’s no wonder
I got worse.
What is a wonder,
is that I actually thought
that things could be different.



© Copyright 2017 Lori Grosser Rhoden - All Rights Reserved
Poet In Pink
Senior Member
Posts 1066
MI
1 posted 2017-05-21 02:20 PM


Hello Lori Your sad heart words touch me deeply as I read today. Having been in similar circumstances myself with my Mom ~ I know how hard it can be to fight depression when you are scared of losing the battle you can't change or win. All we can do is continue to give our love and care ~ Hoping things will start looking up for you dear Poetess ~ Sending along Huggerz & prayers   
jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
2 posted 2017-05-21 02:26 PM


Sometimes we seem to be tested far beyond any misdeeds for which we have to atone, my friend. I believe it must be Karmic in nature and we're paying dues on  something from another "sometime". which is unfair I think - I mean, at least let me know what I did so wrong to deserve such punishment..

Then again, you could say we're paying forward, for another "sometime" yet to come.  Either way . . . what did I do so rotten,  it makes me disparage so.

I know your angst , know your pain through events of my own in the past few years, and all I can say is walk easy, hang in there, be stronger than "it" is, and don't let "it" beat you down.

All things turn, sooner or later, hopefully (tongue in cheek) before we die!

My heart . . .


jimmy

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere
3 posted 2017-05-21 04:38 PM


Thank you for you kind words and understanding Your Pinkness. I appreciate it more than you know. ~L

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere
4 posted 2017-05-21 04:57 PM


This too shall pass (like a painful case of gas). Oh I'm hangin' in okay, that's what I do, is hang-in. I hang in long past the time I shoulda hung it up...I've been married for 40 years(just not to the same man). I can hang in until way past common sense (just ask my family). It (depression) is a side effect of the treatment for him. It makes sense it would mess with mine. No sense in me adding to it feeling bad about it. I'm making my peace with it.
P.U Stinkenbaum
Member
Posts 388
No Fan Of Exhaust Fans
5 posted 2017-05-22 04:14 AM


Miss Lori Rhoden,

I'm truly saddened to know some of what you're dealing with. Yourself, your man and of course even the more routine aspects of living can amplify when the stresses set in. I would hope you have others to interact with to share something of the 'real you' with, not just who you must be in the more difficult capacities.

Though I wish there were, there's little I can do for you Lori Rhoden and I know you're not asking...but if you ever want to just beat the crap out of someone for [almost] no reason at all, I'll volunteer.
For instance, you could begin by saying; "Hey you stupid 'freakin' Stinker! That was the dumbest title for a poem that I've ever read in my entire life and I just can't even stand having you around here anymore! So now you're gonna get a butt-whippin like you've never had in YOUR entire life you poo-headed poet wannabe! When I get through with you...your slime-suckin-silver tongue is gonna head back to the bronze age"!

You know...stuff like that. You can reach me at 1-800-Stinkie or drop by "The Senryu City Grill". I'll be the guy with the spatula flippin flapjacks. Wait until after the breakfast crowd leaves please.

Kinda watch where you're kickin' though will ya? Pinky and I might wanna have some kids later today!

See ya when I see ya!             



Just out looking for the real me...

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere
6 posted 2017-05-22 06:34 AM


I hesitate to give you a tongue lashing (no matter how tempting) as the last person I tongue lashed married me...and that might mess things up with you and pinky. Can't have that, after all, Stinky Pinky is a match made in Heaven. ~L
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