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Open Poetry #49
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California

0 posted 2016-05-30 03:38 PM


Father's Footsteps


Father's footsteps, my march toward death.
A pace measured holding my breath.
Odds stacked against me, playing part.
Feigned religion, a dying art.

For all believe what they need to;
How else to see selfishness through?
But woe to he who looks within—
Dares peel the flesh, reveal the sin.

When hypocrisy holds no sway,
Who lives to fight another day?
Or stands to face that guarded truth
Of fallacy clung to since youth?

The answer, deep within those eyes,
Beyond gloss of reflective lies.
Offer of soul, more than mere token...
For one, a special kind of broken.


Michael Anderson

5/29/2016



[This message has been edited by Michael (06-04-2016 05:16 PM).]

© Copyright 2016 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved
BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
1 posted 2016-05-30 09:21 PM


Michael, you write with such deep emotion and intense introspection. There is so much to ponder and read into.  I think that is such a rare and unique gift.  You stir my thoughts and tug at my heart strings..and always leave me breathing a sigh and catching my breath.

It's a joy to read you..Brava sir.  

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
2 posted 2016-06-01 01:06 AM


nice writing...james
latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
3 posted 2016-06-01 10:38 PM


Ditto to the words spoken by Blues Serenade. Very deep and makes one ponder.I am sure we all sometimes wonder why best to you, Michael. Jo
JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
4 posted 2016-06-04 04:47 PM


I agree with Blues, and one could glean a plethora of ideas in each line read.

As in:
"Or stands to face that guarded truth
Of fallacy clung to since youth?"

Awesome, Michael.


JL

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul,and with all your mind. Love your neighbor as yourself.
Maranatha!

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere
5 posted 2016-06-05 01:26 PM


You write so deeply there are times I wonder if you'll take me deeper than I wish to go, your writing is so powerful... I sip it sparingly as it goes right to my head. This is a wonderful piece. ~L

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
6 posted 2016-06-10 04:25 PM


This would have touched me at any time - but with Father's Day approaching, melancholy has already set up housekeeping in my heart.
Finding our way, learning to separate what we know from what is or might be, recognizing the hypocrites without becoming one... it's a constant challenge. But inside your heart beats a compass worth trusting!

Cari
Member
Posts 411
Englnand
7 posted 2016-06-11 07:14 AM


My take on the poem is it seeks to provide an answer to the unanswerable question i.e. what lies behind the door we are all destined to go through. The father has found the answer in a religious belief that the son has begun to question.
That, I think is the crux of the poem. Every new generation questions the values and beliefs of the proceeding one.  
The rhyme maybe a little forced in places but it doesn’t detract from a thoughtful poem. Good writing.

Cari

[This message has been edited by Cari (06-11-2016 09:00 AM).]

Ari Squire
Member
Posts 488
In The Phallus Lane
8 posted 2016-06-12 01:10 AM


quote:
"But woe to he who looks within—
Dares peel the flesh, reveal the sin"
This...I see as the key to your well penned wisdom.

More feelings and fewer words please

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
9 posted 2016-06-13 10:47 AM


Michael - at his best . . . nothing more needs be said.

enjoyed . . . an understatement -

ENJOYED!

J.

booky1940!
Member
since 2009-04-16
Posts 136
Canada
10 posted 2016-06-13 11:31 AM


"Feigned religion, a dying art"
Yes, true enough, religion may die, but hope and faith in Christ Jesus, those are truly forever!
Thanks for sharing, may you be blessed!

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