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Open Poetry #49
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JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana

0 posted 2014-11-14 09:04 AM


my father
when I think of him
I see a brown paper bag
he took to work
day in and day out
a baloney sandwich and a
boiled egg
my father was a gentle man
everyone who met him
liked him
too bad he was married to my mother
she was a shrew
a manipulator and a child abuser
I was that child
did the goodness of his calming hands
offset his wife's behavior
not in the least

©November 11, 2014 / Jerry Pat Bolton


If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

© Copyright 2014 Jerry Pat Bolton - All Rights Reserved
Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere
1 posted 2014-11-14 11:09 AM


I'm sorry he wasn't able to protect you.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
2 posted 2014-11-14 11:13 AM


He was what we would in these days call a puss.

If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

Redstart
Senior Member
since 2014-05-16
Posts 535

3 posted 2014-11-14 11:19 PM


That hurts. I wonder if your 'hatred' lies more with your father for not standing up for you, or your mother for her wickedness? Either way, that's tough, man.
Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
4 posted 2014-11-16 02:14 AM


Child abuse leaves lasting scars for all involved.
                         Ida

gilead
Senior Member
since 2008-03-10
Posts 1067
nevada, USA
5 posted 2014-11-19 12:02 PM


My mother and father were pillars of strength in my life. It is hard to imagine what would have happened if either of them had abused me.
It is good to get back to the site and find you here, JerryPat.

Best wishes -- Art

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
6 posted 2014-11-19 07:54 AM


Yes Redstart, I blame him for allowing the brutality.

If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
7 posted 2014-11-19 07:54 AM


That's true Ida, they just won't go away.

If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
8 posted 2014-11-19 07:56 AM


I am happy to hear that from you, Art, pillars of strength is the way it is supposed to go..

If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
9 posted 2014-11-19 03:47 PM


Jerry, I have another slant on your dad. He was a good man as you yourself say.I saw men stand by when faced with that type of women. They do not like confrontation and feel all it would do is cause more and maybe worse behavior toward the child.I have also seen men live with a cheating wife and say nothing. Those reasons belong to them alone but I did ask one man once and he said he did not want to leave her because of the children. Some good men who may seem to be a wuss but are just being practical.It is too bad abut your abuse and that he did not at least talk to you about it. There are also many women who stand by and refuse to believe a child who tells then her daddy was molesting her or her granddaddy was or an uncle.It goes with life I guess but I was very naive and never knew how many  men and women have been abused by older men, and some mothers too. It took me many years to learn about it as my growing years were so different. Somewhere in these pages a lot of women told stories.I have printed them out so my daughters and nieces can read them and learn  how to handle these things for  themselves and their children.I was shocked when my older brother told me why he did not accept a trip to Germany with his boss and that when he worked he had to lock his doors to that man. I could never have thought that until he told me. I am just mentioning all this to hopefully help you  find a softness for your dad and hopefully I am correct and  he was taking the lesser road to avoid harder times for you. best to you, Jo

[This message has been edited by latearrival (11-20-2014 12:17 AM).]

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
10 posted 2014-11-19 04:00 PM


Jo, over the years I have analyzed and thought upon this situation and still don't know why he allowed it. The beatings stopped when I was sixteen when I took the belt she was using on me away from her and laid into her. There were no more beatings. I left home when I was eighteen. I live one state away from Taylor, Arkansas and it has been so many years since I have been back I can't remember. I have truly found peace, but there is no way I will ever forget.

If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
11 posted 2014-11-20 12:13 PM


Jerry,I am happy you found peace.It just  seems to come up and I just hope you can put it in the past to feel free of it all. best to you
jo

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
12 posted 2014-11-20 06:52 AM


Somehow I doubt I'll ever be completely free from it, Jo, but thank you for your interest.

If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
13 posted 2014-11-20 10:56 AM



Well, somehow how, in a sort of "vacant" way, I think the experience of at least knowing your father is better than only having a sperm donor that was here and gone before I even opened my eyes.

I also think you need to bring forward whatever good aspects of your relationship (memories) with your father ( and I know there were some - you wouldn't be speaking of him at all if there weren't) and focus on those, rather than just the negativity of the "puss" you see him as.

And (grin) I get the impression through much of your writing, you probably (as did I) deserved some of those lashing!

Nice piece of nostalgia my friend ... enjoyed


j.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
14 posted 2014-11-20 01:02 PM


I didn't know him as my father, I thought I did until I found out I was adopted. He was standoffish with me as long as I knew him. No father/son comradely relationship. He worked and put a roof over my head, clean clothes to wear. As for as me bringing forward "whatever good aspects of your relationship." I have Jimmy. Read what I said in this paragraph about

Of course I deserved punishment, but not the kind of punishment she gave me, man. She would beat me for nothing many, many times...

If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

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