navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #49 » And Then She Did The Damnedest Thing . . .
Open Poetry #49
Post A Reply Post New Topic And Then She Did The Damnedest Thing . . . Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas

0 posted 2014-10-03 10:39 AM




And Then She Did The Damnedest Thing . . .


Core Words:

Love
(Disambiguation –sorry, word misused
because there's no way to "clarify" Love)


Hate (Sparing partner of love – often used in conjunction
with other, significant, words when referring
to one "Loved")


I was six,
and she was almost.
I was ready for marriage.
She laughed. . . silly, she said.

I asked her again, at seven,
at eight,
nine, ten, eleven
and every year thereafter –

At eighteen, she said "Yes",

and if love was like being in heaven,
then our wedding night
was like being on the throne
of God.

At twenty-one
we began to drift apart,
said things we didn't mean,
ignored one another,
slept in separate rooms.

At twenty-two
we came home from work,
she handed me papers,
and out of my pocket
I handed her my own.

We cried.
The two of us,
wrapped in the arms
of one another.
We cried,
we lay in our bed together,
up close, not touching,
each of us listening
to the other breathe.

I love you she whispered,
her back to me,
Me too, you, said I,
mine to her . . .

and then she did the damnedest thing . . .

she died.

I raged, I cried,
I broke things in our house,
I punched holes in
the bedroom wall.

I hated God, and more than that,
I hated me, I hated her,
and Lord, Oh Lord I loved,

I

Loved

Her,


and hated me.

There's a crack in the song,
a warp in the wheel,
my head spins round,
round, and
d
o
w
n
down,
f
a
l
l
I
n
g
on my back,
looking up . . .

sky, dark,
empty,
nothing left -

nothing
left.


Since you.





©wesley james beard, jr.
october 2, 2014


© Copyright 2014 Wesley James Beard, Jr. - All Rights Reserved
JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
1 posted 2014-10-03 10:50 AM


Okay Jimmy, you zonked me completely out with this one. I have read many of your poems, but nothing (that comes to mind) hinted at anything like this. If so my dullard mind missed it. Are you saying she died that very night? Damn man!!

If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
2 posted 2014-10-03 12:38 PM


I am floored and sighing again. I wonder really? how? and why? ~~~ But once again I remind myself that you look around at life and usually write what you see and hear or even read,So! ~~~Absolutey threw me down.Best to you James, jo
  

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
3 posted 2014-10-03 12:51 PM


Ha! Never really had a "time" in mind, Jerry - kinda thought I'd leave it up for the reader to decide.

Was watching a "horror" movie when got the idea (would you believe?). Was kind of a "fun" piece to write for me.  With a little help from some "reality" background I know about from some time past.

Thanks for looking in -
I just can't believe how our wonderful board has slowed!  Will have to spread the word around to others to at least give us a visit.
Maybe they will stay.

I visit more than my participation shows, to at least read, and sometimes comment - but time, is my enemy anymore, And I divide it about equally between this and another board I try to visit periodically.

Mostly to read.  Some awesome writers out there, but this is still my favorite board. Got some good memories here, of some awesome people.  But even they don't seem to participate much anymore.  Shame on us all - except you, of course - nobody can keep up with your output, poetically or commentary.

Way to go, man!!  Kudos!

j.


Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere
4 posted 2014-10-03 03:12 PM


This was a great read. The only saving grace for me is I remembered that not all your writing is autobiographical. So kudos for her dying... it was absolutely awful and perfect.

Lori

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
5 posted 2014-10-04 07:36 PM


Pretty powerful writing. Jimmy.
JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
6 posted 2014-10-04 11:01 PM


I'll never believe in another poem you post.

If they give you ruled paper write sideways.

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
7 posted 2014-10-05 12:14 PM


Your loss . . .
nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
8 posted 2014-10-14 07:59 PM


Love reading you, jw.   M
Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
9 posted 2014-10-16 12:01 PM


Very effective write, dear Jimmy, though rather frightening.

Margherita

Honeybunch
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115
South Africa
10 posted 2014-10-17 12:35 PM


Yes, indeed a most effective write and I'm so glad to have read it after your comment posted to make me know it wasn't "personal".  Always good when interacting with people on whatever level to know that death can be just around the corner.


Pilgrimage
Member Elite
since 2001-12-04
Posts 3945
Texas, USA
11 posted 2014-10-17 03:40 PM


Oh, wow! That one just puts the banana peel down and watches you fall flat on your back and leaves you there, doesn't it? I never saw it coming. And I love the way you did the visuals too.
I'm glad I came in today.  

Nan (Pilgrim variety)

Juju
Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
12 posted 2014-10-17 10:37 PM


I love this!
s1nfully_1nn0c3nt
Senior Member
since 2003-10-26
Posts 1105
Watertown, NY
13 posted 2014-10-20 02:43 AM


I love how you formatted this, makes an interesting piece. Enjoyed.

-Trina
I'll keep these dreams hidden
inside these eyes of mine
until my tears fall
unto my tainted hear

Gale
Senior Member
since 2013-06-10
Posts 578
Russia
14 posted 2014-10-21 01:49 AM


Absolutely killing.
How did she dare?

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
15 posted 2014-11-01 06:56 PM


Mind spinning
eyes tearing

please make it unreal,
really,
make it unreal

oh, may no one ever have this experience
had to find out, had to stop the tears, the pain

i read on thru commentary,
aching that I would learn
that this powerful piece was contrived,
not real,
too much pain, the drain

"from my  pocket, I pulled mine..."
i grasped at the hope of the "after tears" moment

then you hit me again, I ached for you,
how, what, why? Was it an "I don't want to live w/o your love" is that "how" she died, right then?

I still feel the ache of the experience, jwesley, for I know the ache of the first parting and though I'm way beyond hope for that realm of my experience, I still hoped for you for that second until death parted you

Wow! Do you know how to write!!!!!

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
16 posted 2014-11-01 07:04 PM


It's a sad tale, breaks my heart..but so well written.
To make our readers feel deep down emotion is what makes for good poetry.

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
17 posted 2014-11-03 06:23 PM


Wow! Thanks for all the wonderful comments, my friends - does my heart good to know I may have "touched" you.  This IS actually loosely based on real-life friends of mine, (30 or so years ago), where Tammy did die.  Far as I know they were not having marital problems, and her death was a kind of "dumb" one - she had started her own exterminator business and mixed pesticides with her bare hands and arms... death was "poisoning" and ruled accidental --- anyway, I embellished upon it a bit, to say the least.

Again...thanks for reading and commenting.

jimmy

MICHELMAS
Member
since 2012-02-15
Posts 305
Lancashire England
18 posted 2014-11-04 09:22 AM


Excellent write
as to things being slow, poetry seems to come in bursts for me, nothing at present but will return..hopefully

Redstart
Senior Member
since 2014-05-16
Posts 535

19 posted 2014-11-04 09:47 PM


I've read too many of the replies and your responses to leave a suitable comment. But, did she die at 21?  Seems to have happened when you were 22 and she was nearly. Kids can dream, but  dreams end up with back-to-back nights listening to the other breathe. Sad that.
Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #49 » And Then She Did The Damnedest Thing . . .

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary