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Open Poetry #49
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A Black Rose
| Open Poetry #49 |
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A Black Rose |
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Damien Page Junior Member
since 2014-03-30
Posts 22 |
I stand under a painted sky, A dried rose, begging for rain. I wonder whether or not it'll come, yet, sometimes. . .I wish for it to never rain. I'd rather fade away, for this world needs not another deceptive rose like me. Someone, somewhere, is going to try to grab me. . . They are going to try to put me in a vase, and my thorns painted in venom will poison them. They will die trying to save me. I think it's better that I wither away, I think . . . it'll be the best for everyone. The terrain is furious, pulling me apart with vicious winds, trying to tear me from my roots yet, I stay here. I continue trying to survive. . . Trying to survive. . .? Why? What is the point? I believe that everyone has their time. Once your time runs out, the clock stops, and death leaves his throne made of bones, puts on his grim reaper outfit. . . Then, he finds you. Why am I trying to run from what is inevitable? I wish I had the ability to change. A rose is beautiful, but it hurts to touch. What's worse, is I'm a black rose. I symbolize death. Yet, no one realizes it until it's too late. Every house that has had me in its kitchen crumbled around me. I was planted here by my previous owner, she said I was diseased. I was cursed. She said I will never bring happiness to anyone. She planted me in this one spot, And. . . as much as I try to get out of it, As much as I try to somehow move, I can't. I just. . . can't. She will never know the amount of sorrow I feel. She will never know how sorry I truly am. No amount of empty words, broken promises, and shattered dreams will change what I've done. I can only remain what I am. A tainted angel, personified as a black rose. |
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secondhanddreampoet Member Ascendant
since 2006-11-07
Posts 6394a 'Universalist' ! |
a 'word-painting' raw, dark, and powerful! Welcome to the fine blue sands of "P.I.P.-land" by the cyber-sea, Damien ... |
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JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
Dark, and I like dark. This poem takes the word rose and vilifies it. Yes, it is a black rose, but never mind, it is a black rose tainted with the ultimate in gore and violence. Poe would have approved. ~*~ In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem. ~*~ [This message has been edited by JerryPat2 (03-30-2014 07:33 PM).] |
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OwlSA Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347Durban, South Africa |
Angel/Damien, first of all I contest the line: “She said I will never bring happiness to anyone.” Whilst I know that you are referring to a love situation, it is even more difficult to bring happiness to others outside a love situation. Read my reply to you in my poem, 'Last Flutters' (which I wrote before I even knew you had posted this poem, let alone read it) – I think that for a 20-year old man to make not the day, not the week, not the month, but the YEAR of a 68-year old woman is an incredible achievement! Having said that, I am getting back to your poem, which is a magnificent outpouring of emotion yet without any soppy sentimentality, and an exquisite work of art which wowwed me all the way through in its sometimes wild and sometimes poignant, but always mega-effective imagery and the clarity of its expression and the way you took your readers to exactly where you wanted them – that is, to understand exactly where you are coming from. I am certain it must have been very cathartic to write, for which I am very glad. Regarding the content, remembering you from 2008 (I couldn’t have told you it was 2008) and from what you say here, I know that this poem is personal. I know too, that you won’t mind my discussing that. Firstly, we are all ‘deceptive’ ‘tainted angels, personified as a black rose’, except that you are the only one who has put it as beautifully and as poetically as that. Secondly, whether you take this from a Christian point of view – or any other religion – or no religion at all, but a logical point of view, no matter how bad the things are that you have done as expressed in your line: “No amount of empty words, broken promises, and shattered dreams will change what I've done.” you can put that behind you, but first, you have to forgive yourself, even if nobody else does. You are a person, as important as anyone else on the planet – and if you regard other people as important (which I know you do or you wouldn’t feel guilty), then logically, you have to admit that you are important too. There is a huge amount of good that you can do in the world – and that you have already done – like making the YEAR of a 68-year old woman in your reply to me in Last Flutters, lol! – and writing more poems as beautiful as ‘A Black Rose’ and helping others as you have said I have helped you – but you are seriously hampered in that if you don’t forgive yourself first. Believe me, that is crucial. No, you don’t symbolise death. One’s ability to bring unhappiness to anyone is equalled by (if not exceeded by) his/her ability to bring him/her happiness. Think about it. One doesn’t hate somebody who means nothing to one – and likewise you can’t hurt somebody unless he/she cares about you. If your girl friend/ex-girl friend said that you are diseased and/or cursed, it doesn’t mean it is true! It is Wednesday. I have just told you that, but it isn’t true. There isn’t a single person in the world who is perfect and doesn’t do something wrong – no matter how big or how little - every single day of their lives. It is good to take responsibility for your actions, but don’t take on all the guilt of the world on your own shoulders. It doesn’t benefit anyone at all for you to submerge yourself in guilt and self-blame. What benefits everyone around you (even chance people you pass in the street and can greet and smile at) is to take responsibility for your actions; sincerely regret the mistakes you make; forgive yourself; try to rectify them in as far as they can be rectified; try to get forgiveness from anyone whom you have harmed, but if you don’t get it, then move on and do the best you can with the past behind you and a panoramic future ahead of you – a blank canvas with no past and as yet, no future, on to which you can paint the future you want. The line: I can only remain what I am. is good because, you HAVE to know, that in essence, you are good. You are striving for good, and bad people don’t do that. They don’t care one iota. I could go on for pages and pages, but I think that is enough preaching for one night, though I know you will forgive me for it. Owl |
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Damien Page Junior Member
since 2014-03-30
Posts 22 |
Thank you all for the replies <3 I'm glad you enjoy my work, and it's great to be back. |
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Paula Finn Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546missouri |
Doesn't matter the color of the rose it is always beautiful to behold. And I believe there has to be pain to balance out the beauty...how else do you know its beautiful? |
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2islander2 Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825by the sea |
this is dark for sure, and tehre are beautiful and touching images, i loved your poem yann |
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