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Open Poetry #48
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david3
Junior Member
since 2013-03-02
Posts 15
ohio

0 posted 2013-05-17 11:36 PM



Once My Love

I loved her in my dreams for endless years
And longed for once, just once to breathe her scent.
I searched for her and felt the gnawing fears,
From absence of her love and all it meant.
The moment she appeared my heart grew full,
And love once hoped for flourished in a blaze
Of passions fueled by starving heartstrings' pull
And left us drunken, reeling in a daze.
My heaven hoped for soon became my hell,
When I proved too unworthy of her gift.
I failed in pleasing her and loving well,
And she was gone too soon and far too swift.

Each day a day anew to bear my cross,
Each night a dream of her, of love, of loss.

© Copyright 2013 David William La Belle - All Rights Reserved
EmmaRose
Senior Member
since 2011-03-02
Posts 1376
Midwest
1 posted 2013-05-18 11:36 AM


always sad when it leaves you, but as they say, better to have loved
Lighthousebob
Member Elite
since 2000-06-14
Posts 4725
California
2 posted 2013-05-20 09:10 PM


I like how you've taken the strict structure of the sonnet here and made it modern and relatable.  Very, very nice!  I cold really feel both your passion and your loss.  Enjoyed!  
jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
3 posted 2013-05-21 01:20 PM


ALWAYS better to have love, than not. It serves to set the wonderful possibilities of the future.

enjoyed

j.

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
4 posted 2013-05-22 01:40 PM


"I failed in pleasing her and loving well,
And she was gone too soon and far too swift."

Wonderful cadence and rhyme throughout David. This piece flowed effortlessly, an excellent write indeed.

Best wishes,
/Kit

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
5 posted 2013-06-01 10:22 PM


Nice...James
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