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Open Poetry #48
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California

0 posted 2012-10-14 02:41 PM



Crystallized


I lit the candle, heaved a sigh, then walked into the room...
The murky shadows couldn't hide the smell of sweet perfume.
Not set to handle the denial rampant in her voice,
Or lurking madness, I still tried – alas, I had no choice.
The stage now set, the threshold crossed, stood I, in silent wonder...
Before my queen, before my love – before the peals of thunder!
Resounding, wet, and tempest-tossed, the breakers led me in.
Crystalline ice splinters above held, too, a charge of sin.

Her eyebrows raised – pupils narrowed, a slight bearing of teeth...
I did not waver – did not flinch, nor show feeling beneath
My own eyes, crazed, while the marrow in my bones ran ice cold.
How I'd savor bleeding this wench for every lie she told!
But not a word was spoken – not a hint of accusation...
Eyes meeting, with fractured silence now the whole of the equation.
What had I heard?  What thought, broken, was yet dying in my brain?
With no greeting, and no violence, but merely emotional drain.

She walked, nay slithered 'cross the expanse, took hold of both my wrists,
And placed her sweet lips over mine – the parlor breathing up soft mist.
Thought undelivered, I lost my chance... mayhap eternally,
In sudden heat, withering like a vine, as she let go of me.
Echoes of laughter filled the room, as I looked on, fixated...
Completely disoriented, with all passions abated.
Ever after set to consume the hero in the making,
Lost to a kiss, implemented, from which there'll be no waking.

It started slow, a low rumble – barely perceptible...
Primordial, it grew at length to heights unimaginable.
I tried to run, alas stumbled, falling face first to the floor;
And could not stand, lacking all strength – the ice splinters providing encore.
Now lay I, dead, with all in head alive, and clear... resilient!
Revealing to me all I couldn't see while subject to her torment…
Everything she said, the feelings I bled, all reason simply paralyzed
Irrationally by some need in me, forever crystallized.


Michael Anderson

[This message has been edited by Michael (10-14-2012 08:14 PM).]

© Copyright 2012 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved
JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
1 posted 2012-10-14 03:29 PM


Somehow I sense an awakening with this offering, Michael. Still, that one chance to set the record straight undone by the poison of a betrayers kiss. Oh, you have company my friend, many has been the man who thought a kiss from the serpent of Eve would make everything okay again, and alas and drat, history doth repeat itself, or as that great statesman, Yogi Berra wisely said, "It's déjà vu all over again." Still, I sense an awakening with this offering, Michael.

~*~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~*~

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
2 posted 2012-10-14 04:54 PM


Amazingly vivid, my breath shortened while reading.

Margherita

ebonygirl
Member Elite
since 2011-07-14
Posts 2000
California U.S.A
3 posted 2012-10-14 11:44 PM


I felt as though I was in another
lifetime,  watching it all unfold.
Amazing, Michael,
Ms. E

JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
4 posted 2012-10-15 06:54 AM


"Completely disoriented, with all passions abated."

Yep, I think I'd find a new place to visit.
As read I, crystallized...



JL

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul,and with all your mind. Love your neighbor as yourself.
Maranatha!

Lady Goodman
Member
since 2012-10-04
Posts 193

5 posted 2012-10-15 04:11 PM


This has such a strong sense of archetype to it, that I can't help but to wish for it to continue on, as it feels to me, like one page that fell out of a book of a hero's journey.

*smile*

My idealism will not allow for a hero's fall with no chance of redemption.

Quite the ponder that you have penned, dear Michael...

Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
6 posted 2012-10-16 12:31 PM


Well JP, not sure if there was an awakening or not… This was more just trying to write a story, and letting the pen lead the way, had no real person in mind when I wrote it.  Was trying not to be *so dark, but alas the darkness creeped in anyway.  What can I say?  And who knows, maybe there’s a subconscious awakening I just haven’t realized yet.  

Margherita, thank you.  I’m glad you enjoyed it.

Ms. E., that’s a true compliment.  Thank you.  

Don’t visit too often, JL.  It’s not recommended for good mental health status.

Lady Goodman, not so sure the hero’s getting up any time soon… but it will happen eventually I’m sure.  Your *idealism is welcome.

Michael

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