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Open Poetry #48
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Amaryllis
Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306
Mi now

0 posted 2012-08-04 11:44 PM


.




Let everything that goes out, return.
Let pigeon's white wings find
their dusty rooks, let mineral rains dissipate
upon hot asphalt streets
and lift again to the stratosphere.

Let flood tides ease their sandy reaches
and ebb toward green depths. Let redwoods rise,
then crumble in fecundity
to feed the nearby sapling, let all that ever went,
come back. Let every deed and word
crest and fall in perfect retroaction
upon their author.


.

[This message has been edited by Amaryllis (08-05-2012 12:20 AM).]

© Copyright 2012 Amaryllis - All Rights Reserved
OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
1 posted 2012-08-05 02:30 AM


Wow, Amaryllis!  This is beautiful, very clever and I wanted to say that your dénoument is valid-vicious - but it is NOT vicious - it a uniquely, exquisitely and cleverly expressed retribution for him for what he subjected you or the protagonist to - and a healing, almost Biblical (perhaps exactly Biblical) celebration of the resurrection of an indomitable spirit to free yourself/herself from such torture!  This is a veritable work of art and an inspiration to anyone who may be in the same position as you or whoever the real or imagined protagonist is.  Well done!

Owl

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
2 posted 2012-08-05 04:26 AM


I will never in my life, and I've been around a while, understand abusiveness of this nature, and agree with you 100 percent EXCEPT, I think the so-and-so should get it double or more...

Well written, my friend.

j.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
3 posted 2012-08-05 07:08 AM


What a far different kind of message to the abusive husband. Like j., I feel the retribution is more like ten-fold.

~*~ If they give you ruled paper write sideways. ~*~

Nigelinoz
Member
since 2012-07-24
Posts 71
Victoria,Australia
4 posted 2012-08-05 07:49 AM


As a man myself I am disgusted,appalled and ashamed by the way some "men" ,and  I use the word loosely abuse their partners,it makes me very angry and sometimes ashamed to be male.
This is good writing though,well written and I agree with the other comments,the abuser deserves heavy retribution.
Well done.
Cheers
N'oz

Amaryllis
Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306
Mi now
5 posted 2012-08-05 07:53 AM


Thank you so much, everyone

A

Startime1955
Senior Member
since 2012-04-22
Posts 1072
Alberta, Canada
6 posted 2012-08-05 08:38 AM


I am in the process of divorcing just such a man and I must say this poem is wonderful to read and feel...I am so thankful that you have written it...I too am told that the changes in me are amazing...but I know it isn't changes it is the me finally free to be me...Great Writing...*BIG HUGS*

*may our dreams ever be magical*

ebonygirl
Member Elite
since 2011-07-14
Posts 2000
California U.S.A
7 posted 2012-08-05 12:20 PM


Everyone will get "theirs" in the end.
Well done,
ms. e

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
8 posted 2012-08-05 09:23 PM


I really love the way you see things, and how you put such a unique twist on your thoughts.

Your poetry is special for so many reasons.

How nice to read you here again, Amaryllis~  


Alison
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!
9 posted 2012-08-06 01:16 AM


You are such a fine writer.  It's good to read your poems again - this is powerful.  And beautifully written.

A

Amaryllis
Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306
Mi now
10 posted 2012-08-06 11:06 PM


Thank you thank you, everyone, your replies mean so much ...and huge hugs, prayers & strength to anyone else going through this!


A

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
11 posted 2012-08-08 10:39 PM


Very nice...bet this made you feel better...keep going...James
Amaryllis
Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306
Mi now
12 posted 2012-08-09 01:02 AM


Thank you, James

A

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
13 posted 2012-08-09 02:14 PM


Impressive work, dear Amaryllis. A somehow karmic vision, that finds me nodding in admiration of your talent.

Prayers shared.

Margherita

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
14 posted 2012-08-09 02:18 PM


What a lovely boomerang you've constructed! Marvelous!

Zall
Member
since 2002-08-25
Posts 214
London, England
15 posted 2012-08-09 03:01 PM


loved the construction..

wonderful.

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
16 posted 2012-08-17 10:17 PM


Dear abusive husband, your wife is a fox, really a fox, let her introduce you to Toerag, I'm an abusive person period and would love to introduce myself to you...I'm such a sweet guy, really....and if I'm not friendly enough, you need to meet my son. He's gotta be the sweetest guy in the world, UFC, undefeated, and just loves a good workout now and then..then, after about 30 seconds with a wife abuser he could go get that workout?.....Gal, hope this isn't about you but if so please don't stay.....you're obviously smart by your poetry, and gorgeous, and I know a Toerag that can end it quick.....
Amaryllis
Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306
Mi now
17 posted 2012-08-18 01:51 AM


Thank you, Margherita, Sunshine, and Zall...most appreciated

Toe! You make me smile. Thanks so much for all you said...and yes, 'tis about yours truly, unfortunately...but yes I'm gone. Just working through leftovers. I wouldn't be free to post such, otherwise. Therapeutic!! Lol
Thanks again, you gave me such a lift

Best to all-
Amaryllis

luminosity
Senior Member
since 2005-11-18
Posts 813

18 posted 2012-08-18 10:49 AM


can I ditto owlsa's reply, she got it perfect...and then can I ditto you, for you got it even more so...if there is such a thing as more than perfect...sigh...this is so resolutely strong, I cannot help but show my weakness through tears...
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