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Alison

Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-27

Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!

0 posted 2012-03-02 08:27 PM

A friend of mine died recently and this is what I wrote for his funeral.  I am sure many of you have done the same - just thought I'd share it.

Alison

-----

Jerry and I worked together for a couple of years, and Jerry became a very good friend.

I can’t tell all of you who Jerry was – you know far better than I.  I can only tell you that he touched me deeply.  He taught me about family, responsibility, respect and friendship.  Jerry was among the most honest people I have met. He was honest with his feelings.  He was honest with his opinions.  He was honest with his desire to see others do the best that they can.  He was a teacher – teaching us all through his actions and not his words.  Jerry accepted me as a friend and trusted me in a way that truly honors me to this day.  He became like a brother to me.

Getting to know Jerry was fun and interesting.  Saying goodbye is not so easy.  I can’t say goodbye to him, because he will be forever with me.  He resides here in my heart and here in my memories.  He lives on in each of you.  As long as we remember and share him, Jerry will be part of our world.  There are no goodbyes for people like Jerry.

He lives in the wind that talks to me
He rides on the river to the sea
He is part of the hills
He is part of the trails
Jerry is part of the train riding the rails

Stories he shared are a part of me
In some ways he gave me eyes to see
To see the land
To see his friends
Jerry loved Alaska without an end

I still see Jerry with his smile wide
Standing tall with Indian pride
Teaching us to get along
Teaching us to remain true
And give everything to all we do

There are no goodbyes to Jerry, you see
He lives on in the hills, rivers and trees
He lives in our hearts and our minds
His smile warm; his words always kind
A friend like Jerry is hard to find

I’ll miss you, Jerry.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

1 posted 2012-03-02 08:31 PM

I am very sorry for your loss, Alison. Your presentation was beautiful.

~*~ If they give you lined paper, write sideways. ~*~

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

2 posted 2012-03-02 09:42 PM

You are sharing love here...James

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-11-07

Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa

3 posted 2012-03-03 02:30 AM

Alison, wordless hugs, for you and Jerry's family and friends. I never knew Jerry, but the tears are still exploding down my face and my heart is convulsing. Your beautiful words and his having inspired them, and on top of it, loving Alaska, makes me feel as though I know the part of him that you know, the most important part, and I am there with you - in retrospect - at the funeral, hiding at the back, making a fool of myself with my uncontrolable sobs.

Owl

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius

since 2001-03-19

Posts 13631
West Coast

4 posted 2012-03-03 06:23 AM

Tender and warm little one,

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

5 posted 2012-03-03 07:31 AM

Jerry touches all of us through your words, Alison.

M

ice
Member Elite

since 2003-05-17

Posts 3404
Pennsylvania

6 posted 2012-03-03 08:19 AM

Ali

"He lives in the wind that talks to me"

I think I heard him this morning,
In the spring-voice of a Cardinal.
Being not contricted by physics anymore,
He has joined with universal spirits.

I also heard his drum this morning,
In the wingbeats of grouse wings;

"There are no goodbyes "

There is no need for goodbyes,
Perhaps a "see you later"

Excellent poetry!

Namaste

Nicole
Senior Member

since 1999-06-23

Posts 1835
Florida

7 posted 2012-03-03 08:29 AM

Alison, I am sure many have done the same thing, as you have said; I'm positive that many fewer than that have done so with the tenderness that you have here.

2islander2
Member Ascendant

since 2008-03-12

Posts 6825
by the sea

8 posted 2012-03-03 12:10 PM

vibrant hommage alison, this is very and deeply emotional, thanks for sharing this difficult time with talent and heart,

yann

The_Doctors_Angel_32
Member

since 2011-01-14

Posts 337
Florida, USA

9 posted 2012-03-03 12:26 PM

This is a very tender and loving thing you wrote here. I did something like this for my Uncle James funeral and actually read it. There was not a dry eye in the whole place after I did. I truly enjoyed the read!!!

When the family is together, the soul is at peace - Russian Proverb

ebonygirl
Member Elite

since 2011-07-14

Posts 2000
California U.S.A

10 posted 2012-03-03 12:30 PM

Such caring feelings for your friend were well expressed in your poem, Alison. Ms. E

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis

since 2007-09-16

Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California

11 posted 2012-03-03 01:59 PM

So sorry to hear about your friend, Alison I am sure he was touched by this lovely tribute.
Ida

Alison

Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-27

Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!

12 posted 2012-03-03 10:32 PM

Thank you all for your kind and caring thoughts. Honestly, it felt good to honor him in the only way that I really know how. Through the words I wrote. I'll miss him.

A

rachaelfuchsberger

Senior Member

since 2007-02-21

Posts 609
Las Vegas, NV

13 posted 2012-03-04 04:39 PM

Z,
I'm incredibly sorry for your loss. I can't imagine how you feel. Jerry, wherever he may be, knows your words, your thoughts, and your feelings. I'm certain they've touched him just as deeply as they have those of us who read them here. Probably deeper.

~Arana Darkwolf~
An' it harm none, do what ye will. Blessed be.

Alison

Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-27

Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!

14 posted 2012-03-04 11:14 PM

Thank you, Rachael. I read this in front of his friends and family. It was harder than I thought it would be - but, it was gratifying too as they took so much from the words that I wrote. It meant more to me because it meant so much to them and helped build a bridge betwen our two cultures. They invited me back to the village to work on Jerry's grave on Memorial Day -- and I am truly honored.

A

Daddy Goose38
Member

since 2010-09-04

Posts 430
obama's a rice paper tiger

15 posted 2012-03-09 11:48 AM

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, Ali.
Has Midnitesun really left me? She left so much around me me, long, long, after she moved so far away? ... there is so much of her still in the apartment--the moose antlers and ulu knife she brought me from Alaksa, the beach pebbles that she picked from me from the seashore at Haynes, the mountains and glaciers of the Inside Passage, her stuff 0on Pip I have yet to read, how she yet tells that I am cared about and loved. I won't say "I understand," because I really don't ... probably can't really. Know that you reside in my life and in our hearts, that you are always cared about and loved, whatever circumstances should conspire to do.
Lots of hugs (is that all I can doo?)
Jaime

JL
Member Ascendant

since 2004-04-01

Posts 6128
Texas, USA

16 posted 2012-03-09 12:08 PM

So sweet.

JL

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul,and with all your mind. Love your neighbor as yourself.
Maranatha!

jwesley
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-04-30

Posts 7563
Spring, Texas

17 posted 2012-03-09 12:39 PM

Very, very well expressed, my friend.

my heart to you . . .

j.

Misty Lilacs
Senior Member

since 2005-11-15

Posts 1060
White Birch Forest

18 posted 2012-03-09 01:21 PM

This beautiful piece of writing touched my heart. He must have been a wonderful person and friend. I am so sorry he is gone. Hang on to your memories.

ooxx Marti

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

19 posted 2012-03-09 03:33 PM

Aligirl...

I, too, had an Indian friend by the name of Jerry. Decades ago he helped me in an interview for a legal brief while I was going through paralegal classes. His help resulted in my getting an A. He was a good man...

And, I have given two eulogies. I know what it is like to do so - not easy, but the best we can do is bring that person back to life for a brief moment while holding back our own grief.

You did very well, Little One.

Bless you.

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

20 posted 2012-03-13 06:26 PM

I'm so sorry for you loss. You wrote your love and respect for your friend so very beautifully... and in so honoring him, introduced us all to a wonderful human being.

Alison

Member Rara Avis

since 2008-01-27

Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!

21 posted 2012-04-02 12:06 PM

This is going to be take-a-deep breath and respond post - thank you all.

Jerry,

Thank you for reading this tribute to a wonderful friend.

Alison

-

James,

Thank you.  Sharing love is the best thing to share. Right?

Alison

-

Diana,

You have a loving and tender heart.  I believe that we all carry a piece of Jerry now that he is shared.  I know you feel him and will remember him from time to time.  That is good.

Love,
Alison

_

Dark Stranger,

Thank you.  I am happy that you are not a Stranger to me.

Ali-san

-

Maureen,

Thank you.  That is how it should be.  I am glad that you hold a tiny piece of him too.

Alison

-

ice,

There is no word for goodbye in Jerry's language.  Interesting, huh.  You tapped right into that.  He is among us on the wind and in the staccato beat of the grouse.

Thank you.
Alison

-

Nicole,

Thank you.  He was a very speical man.

Alison

-

yann,

It is an honor, truly, to share my thoughts with poets like you.  You are one that I know understands on a deep level.  Thank you.

Alison

-

The_Doctors_Angel_32,

Thank you.  What I saw, and was thanked for, was touching on the side of Jerry that his people loved best about him.  His joy of home, family and culture.  Sharing my words to those who loved and knew him best was a tremendous honor.

Thank you
Alison

-

MsE,

Thank you, wonderful lady.

Alison

-

Thank you, dear Rachael.

Z

-

Jamie,

You are cared about and loved.  Kacy will never be forgotten and I am so delighted that you shared friendship and life with her.  You are a very speical man and a very speical friend.

xoxoxo
Ali

-

Thank you, dear JL

A

-

Thank you, Jimmy.  You are pretty speical to me - your poetry and photographs show a very kind and loving heart.

a

-

Marti,

Thank you so much.  I will.  I promise.

Alison

-

Sunshine,

The "Jerrys" that we have known have been good men.  I love that.  Thank you. You are very dear to me also.

xoxoxo
Alison

-

Ruth,

Thank you for reading, caring and sharing.  xoxoxoxo
Alison

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