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Open Poetry #48
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Watershed
| Open Poetry #48 |
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Watershed |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida 
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she loves how his sleep-lips touch her forehead in some form of abstract companionship, when night is soft like velvet and she is allowed the smallness of pushing past the boundaries of her mediocraty. there was a beginning to it all and in breaths she pled, softly; and he nodded, and unraveled her intentions one thread at a time. the night, for her, gives way to a gentler murmur and a look that climbs as ivy, shaded; that ripples the dark pools of doubt until there is a loosening, a breaking that wraps sounds like colors and her mind is like wildflowers, fielded and vibrant. he would crawl into her skin then; push out and fill her breath, wearing her like a jacket, fleece-lined and lovely. she loves him then, unchained; before the industrious hum of the cicadas, before the lonely ochre cry of the sandhill crane, across the wetlands. on the cusp of dawn, when light is soft; they discover her watershed |
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| © Copyright 2012 Nicole Williams - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
You have such a unique and special way of describing things, Nicole. Always enjoy your poetry. Ida |
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ebonygirl Member Elite
since 2011-07-14
Posts 2000California U.S.A |
Nicole, how do you do it? To design the images, the message, so beautifully. "... and in breaths she pled, softly; and he nodded, and unraveled her intentions one thread at a time. ... he would crawl into her skin then; push out and fill her breath, wearing her like a jacket, fleece- lined and lovely." Beautiful, Ms. E |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Love this! And the first two lines are awesome. j. |
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JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
What can I say? That hasn't been said. You presented this poem with such softness and love. Superb. Superbowl poetry! ~*~ I gave up feeling guilty just to survive a long time ago ~*~ |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
Ms Nicole, even the in and out of caustic worshiper of blue mirrors would bow at this sigh song. Enjoyed it lady |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
Ida and Ms E - thank you both, so much. Your replies are lovely, and make me smile.  j - Thanks! I thought of the first two lines when I had my hands plunged elbow-deep in dishwater, and I made a HUGE mess trying to write them down before I forgot them. Everything else seemed to fall into place. Jerry - You've said plenty enough for me, with just that. Thank you D - Why, thank you sug |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
"before the industrious hum of the cicadas, before the lonely ochre cry of the sandhill crane, across the wetlands. on the cusp of dawn, when light is soft; they discover her watershed" ahh now this... i can see on canvas... too beautiful! :-) |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
The visuals throughout this piece are so vivid, Nicole. Wonderful imagery - I particularly loved these lines, "and unraveled her intentions one thread at a time." "and a look that climbs as ivy, shaded;" "wearing her like a jacket, fleece-lined and lovely." Such a beautiful write, much enjoyed. Best wishes, /Kit |
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ice Member Elite
since 2003-05-17
Posts 3404Pennsylvania |
Excellent poetry, story, and form. I can relate to every word, seems like I have experienced these same vibrations, only in a different room....:-) Well done, Nicole |
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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666California |
The safety and peace of your watershed is something I have witnessed in you poetry a couple of times now. To have looked up the term and be able to picture you on this high ground where all troubles flows past on either side, not capable of reaching you, and whom you've chosen to share this sacred place with, grants much perspective. A beautifully rendered piece. I like your softer side. Michael |
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Spiros Zafiris Senior Member
since 2002-10-20
Posts 982Canada |
..yes, 'tis the very impressive poem we dream up and we wake and tell ourselves, "i wish i could remember it now" |
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tracie66 Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713Australia |
wonderful write in so many ways, your way with words and the visual journey is fabulous Nicole Love is the life of the soul... |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
When lines this beautiful knock on your mind's door, a mess of dishwater on the floor is small price. *S* |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
Em - Thank you, lovely. Kit - Thank you so much! ice - Was that you?  Thank youMichael - Thank you hon, I may be covered with barbs but I have a soft belly-side. tracie66 - so sweet, thank you!suthern - Right? I've made plenty of messes in my time trying to reach for a pen and paper. More reason why I should just have them hanging around my neck lol. |
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JL Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128Texas, USA |
"the night, for her, gives way to a gentler murmur and a look that climbs as ivy, shaded; that ripples the dark pools of doubt until there is a loosening, a breaking that wraps sounds like colors and her mind is like wildflowers, fielded and vibrant." A poetic watershed. Loved this verse best. JL Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul,and with all your mind. Love your neighbor as yourself. |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Nicole, I, too, love how you use words to create a painting and feeling inside me. You make me understand by holding my hand and taking me through each beautiful line you write. Know what I mean, bean? Love this. A |
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Nicole Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835Florida |
JL - thank you, I'm so pleased Alison - That, is an amazing reply...and it's very touching. I feel like I struggle so much trying to just get the words out, and your understanding is a gift. Thanks hon |
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