»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #46
»
Strum
| Open Poetry #46 |
|
Strum |
|
|
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California 
|
The path turns fallow beneath my feet bare and brown so much youth beat within a sin it seems to shod the truth and casually walk around as if time wasn't a circle you woke to God is the question still and though I see the warming light it is my own with wings and flight and the guts of glory that came from drowning and the question who is dead I have loved the lace in time such pretty weaving catches me planting well the seed that wonders always asking slow or fast detesting the blood of the righteous to save the sisters and daughters from the strangle of skin The petals mold and droop into goodbye even from the rigid frozen winter and to see them stir the air takes purity and I despair my lack Though I have taken songless wind and with my ear created harmony unglued the glass and rubbed the wood until my fingers ached and still questioned why I worked the love into the finish to feel it there smooth and unafraid of weather while my soft skin ached from the strum yet still with joy succumbed ---------- RP from 12-06 |
||
| © Copyright 2010 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
JerryPat Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991Louisiana/America |
When I read a poem of yours, Martie, I wind up at the end of it wondering how in the world am I going to comment on it. Why? You ask? Because you have such a fluid way of describing things, unorthodox in a good way. Example: "to save the sisters and daughters / from the strangle of skin" To me that is such a wonderful way of saying you wish you could keep them from dying, and if that isn't what you meant please don't tell me. I want to remember it as such. "God is the question still" Yes, and this is the theme and the search and the heartbreak concerning "the blood of the righteous." I absolutely love your poetry. I'm saving this. http://swampwriter.blogspot.com/ |
||
|
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Sissie...this is one that could go into your someday book, y'know. Something to come back to, like a beloved page.   |
||
|
Lori Grosser Rhoden Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202Fair to middlin' of nowhere |
Martie-JerryPat said it all, I couldn't agree with him more. Love your stuff too! Lori |
||
|
Prasad Nataraj Senior Member
since 2008-05-29
Posts 1149Bangalore,India |
"The petals mold and droop into goodbye even from the rigid frozen winter and to see them stir the air takes purity and I despair my lack" like these lines especially. Fine writing this. "Hardwork pays in the long run" |
||
|
gilead Senior Member
since 2008-03-10
Posts 1067nevada, USA |
Poetry, the transcendent language that creates reality, if there is no reality foundational to the thought that presses upon the powers of the imagination. I like the unusual descriptive phrases in the poem, ones that are not conventional, but a stretch into another realm of perception. I guess what I'm saying is that great ideas should not be bound up in the chains of formal prosody, but should be wild and free! A wonderful read! Art |
||
|
Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
Beautiful, Martie. I remain a fan! Amaryllis A pile of scribbles here: |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
