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Open Poetry #46
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Yuka
Member
since 2010-08-19
Posts 71
china

0 posted 2010-10-04 11:18 AM


Like other¡¯s passing by
Mine no disturbing her either
I stopped to desire she coming to me
This April bird with black feather all over
But she walked a leisurely step
Beside a small pine, over a lawn in the city center,
Neither approaching
Nor going away further
As if a piece of cunning fish
Facing against me, across the fence

Suddenly like a naughty child
She turned around deftly
Jumping and running to lawn central
One of her companions, stayed there
Waiting for her eagerly


© Copyright 2010 Yuka - All Rights Reserved
latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
1 posted 2010-10-04 11:28 AM


Yuka, I  really  liked your  visit with the black feathered bird. She looked shyly at you and then turned to perform for you. How sweet the encounter with you. latearrival

P.S you are  writing in English well.I  liked that you used the word deftly.

easy1
Senior Member
since 2010-05-22
Posts 1209
Southeastern USA
2 posted 2010-10-04 12:33 PM


A deftly described encounter... When will those birds learn, "no bag, no bread"...?
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

3 posted 2010-10-04 12:57 PM


nice to read you again...

I think the unusual wording that sometimes comes from transaltions fascinating...
you've taken a common occurnace and painted a word image that can be metaphor for other things..
well done.

Yuka
Member
since 2010-08-19
Posts 71
china
4 posted 2010-10-05 02:34 AM


Thank you Latearrival, for your like and encouragement. Really happy you liked my writing. It¡¯s hard to translate my Chinese poem into English, cause always there are something in Chinese I cannot make it out for English. So your encouragement meant so much for me.

Thanks easy1, thank you for your lovely leaving word.

Thank you Cpat, for your visit again, and comment.

Capricious
Member
since 2002-09-14
Posts 89
California, USA
5 posted 2010-10-05 09:09 AM


What is it about black birds ... they're almost universally impish!

Thank you for sharing this delightful little snippet of your day ... that bird doesn't know what she's missing.  

Misty Lilacs
Senior Member
since 2005-11-15
Posts 1060
White Birch Forest
6 posted 2010-10-05 10:59 AM


Very nice. I have a passion for crows!

Marti

Sunkissed
Senior Member
since 2002-12-03
Posts 610

7 posted 2010-10-05 11:45 AM


I cared for a baby crow once. A delightful experience that I will always treasure. Lovely poem, Yuka, looking forward to reading more of your work.

~Sunkissed

Yuka
Member
since 2010-08-19
Posts 71
china
8 posted 2010-10-05 11:59 AM


Thank you Marti for comment. But I have a passion for sparrows ļ

Thank you Sunkissed. Ohh, hope always be sunkissed. ƒº¡@¡G¡^

Earl Brinkman
Senior Member
since 2010-03-03
Posts 1183
Osaka, Japan
9 posted 2010-10-11 07:34 AM


I liked this poem expecially the last stanza.  Black birds have their priorities!
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
10 posted 2010-10-11 10:04 PM


Enjoyed...James
Yuka
Member
since 2010-08-19
Posts 71
china
11 posted 2010-10-12 03:23 AM


thank you brinkman,for your like
me too, like the last stanza.several years ago sometimes when walking through a squre near my home£¬i could see oftenly one or two black birds play on the lawn, they looked so leisurely and freely and i was so envious of them.

thank you James for your enjoyed

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