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Open Poetry #46
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Cpat Hair
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0 posted 2010-08-30 07:24 AM


Thick these trees and the darker shadow remain
Till noon when in a slight lift of veil one might say
It only dim

Legions here in Bones lie now

Gretel held the tiny hand and wandered on
Wanting sweet the taste of more
Dropping crumbs to find her way
Among the bleach of rib and clavicles
Strewn in leaves and pine

Perhaps, she thought as the sole of feet
Raised a must of dust from path
A Queen I will become
To dance among the finest ladies
As I have only seen
The once

Time upon
And they marched on across the river
Met in hale blows from the cowards who
Would not stand in rows and march
Like men of Rome

Gretel turned to the brother there
Released his hand and brushed back her hair
Singing soft a song she'd learned
To sing when fear
Stalked her mind

"Oh hungry I am" she cried
And turned to basket and looked inside
Only to meet her brother's eyes
The other way, looking in

"No bread is left" she sighed
And turned to see the crumbs she dropped
Devoured by crows with crimson crowns
"and we are lost" her brother cried


All is gone! The echo rang
Through empty trees and on the bodies now
Two legions deep strewn along with stone
And arrows fletch from deep within
These tall dark trees

"A house!" "Lets go my brother dear"
She wished with fervent tears
To be home~~ to be home~~

While in the window looking out
Livia sighed and thought of a bath
For both and let greed begin to form
"So I shall" she whispered


Gretel fought the dream with silent scream
Having forgotten tales of witches and wolves
to turn and reach

again
  for what had
never been


Footnote: Teutoburg is a forest in Germany, where the Roman army lost 25000 men in a defeat as it tried to invade the region. They were defeated from behind the thick stand of trees that would not allow them to form ranks and fight as they were trained.

Livia was born in 59 or 58 BCE. The daughter of a Roman noble named Marcus Livius Drusus Claudianus, she is often referred to as Livia Drusilla. At the age of 15 or 16, she was married to Tiberius Claudius Nero, who was an opponent of the young Octavian. It was rumored that she had some hand in the early deaths of some of Augustus's designated heirs, though never proven and much against the personna she is attibuted to have had.

[This message has been edited by Cpat Hair (08-30-2010 08:08 AM).]

© Copyright 2010 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
Sunkissed
Senior Member
since 2002-12-03
Posts 610

1 posted 2010-08-30 08:14 AM


I am in awe as always. I admire the way you can weave two subjects together to form a story and yet carry a message in between.  

Enjoyed!

~Sunkissed

Eusta B. Mae
Senior Member
since 2010-05-03
Posts 903

2 posted 2010-08-30 08:15 AM


Way cool with the history!  First with the math, now this. Quite a talent, I'd say. Enjoyed! ebm
Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

3 posted 2010-08-30 08:20 AM


Sunkissed... you are entirely too kind, but thank you for such nice words.
Cpat Hair
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Posts 11793

4 posted 2010-08-30 08:22 AM


EBM... many thanks...
   I am glad you could appreciate this


Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
5 posted 2010-08-31 04:23 AM


Goodness gracious, dear Poet, you have woven a fabulous story here ... history and fairy tales mixed in a harmonious, captivating flow of words.

I will keep this, because it is something that speaks to me ...Haensel und Gretel ... and Livia ... both in  a way part of my life.

Fantastic job!

Love,
Margherita

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
6 posted 2010-08-31 04:30 AM


... forgot to click the library now, it's done.
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

7 posted 2010-08-31 05:53 AM


Margherita
  happy you enjoyed ma'am

The Lady
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634
The Southwest
8 posted 2010-09-03 01:48 AM




intriguing, very intriguing
I enjoyed

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

9 posted 2010-09-03 07:51 AM


thanks ma'am... glad you found it interesting


vandana
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since 1999-10-22
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USA
10 posted 2010-09-04 10:30 AM


nice
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

11 posted 2010-09-04 12:52 PM


Much like Gregory Maquire, you take a story and manage to keep it intact while you make it your own. Very well done rt.
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