The Floating Door. - pipTalk Forums

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Open Poetry #46

The Floating Door.

viking_metal
Senior Member

since 2007-02-02

Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.

0 posted 2010-07-06 01:25 AM

(my life before you was a plane crash)

each time I crawl into bed with you
it feels as though I've been treading water for days
and finally happened upon a floating door

painted with underground rap lyrics and delicate yellow flowers
brass handles aged with hardship and laughter
a sturdy lock to which only I have the key

I want nothing more than to float back to land
and save you, as you saved me, in that ocean of incomplete
place you in my doorway, proud to show you off

I want you to be the first thing I see
The first thing I touch with callus palm
every time I arrive home, for the rest of my life.

(I survived)

______________________________
Blueprint to Happy (series)

Fall in love early, fall in love often.

Bastet
Member

since 2010-05-07

Posts 246

1 posted 2010-07-06 04:02 AM

Very original and clear imagery, especially for a love poem. I never would have thought of the metaphor of a plane crash, but it works. A really good poem!

Eldest
Member

since 2010-06-15

Posts 177
Alabama

2 posted 2010-07-06 09:58 AM

very good, the imagery is very clear, I can see your door with yellow flowers.

viking_metal
Senior Member

since 2007-02-02

Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.

3 posted 2010-07-06 10:06 AM

Thank you Bastet.

I appreciate your kind words.

Thanks Eldest! It's a real pretty door, ain't it?

Fall in love early, fall in love often.

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