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Open Poetry #46
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When The Old Man Died I Did Not Cry (Father's Day repost)
| Open Poetry #46 |
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When The Old Man Died I Did Not Cry (Father's Day repost) |
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icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows 
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He was still alive when I took his hand; his strength almost gone, his eyes child bright with the good fear of that first big kid ride hoping to fly on the edge of wild at a real grownup amusement park. You see, I knew he had ridden the Coney Island Cyclone because he had ridden it with me; I could see that he was thinking this was going to be an even bigger ride. There are always conversations left unfinished, precious trivia left unsaid, it goes along with living with memories of the dead. He tried to say it all then with his eyes; he couldn't talk real loud, the life clock was ticking fast the spring almost all run down; I said, "So they tell me you're taking a little trip and leaving the old broad home." He tried to laugh, could only gasp with all the energy he could spare. I held his hand and walked alongside as they rolled him down the drive to a shiny quilted metal meat wagon. He smiled when I asked if he wanted them to blow the siren loud, just for him. When we got to the door a young paramedic dared to try to move me back, but I was holding hands. I scared that poor young boy with eyes my Pa had given me long before I was a man. His own eyes sparkled up at me, and he was looking proud going off to die while I said, "If they've got dancing girls you better save a few for me, because I'll be there directly, it really won't be long." He squeezed my hand with all the old familiar strength that I had always known in him, when I was just a child, when I'd wait for him for days on end wondering if this time was going to be the time he was never coming back, but then each time, when he finally did return, he would grab my hand and squeeze until I thought maybe it would break; then he would throw me on his shoulder and we'd barely make it through the door. I had come to wonder where that man had gone, in long years of growing old apart, when all of life turned cold and he grew smaller in my eyes. I never knew why he didn't kill my mother for the hell she put us through; I guess that's where his strength had gone, trying to save his children's lives, trying not to lose his mind, trying just to stay alive, He really was a stronger man than I. So, looking down at him knowing I had made him laugh, knowing he was not afraid to be afraid, knowing he had realized he had no more need to save his energy, I let him crush my hand in his and give it all to me. ©2003, 2010 by icebox |
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| © Copyright 2010 icebox - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Yo Icebox, This works great as a Father's Day poem. Bobby |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
This tugs so hard at my heart strings~ Profoundly poignant and bittersweet this is. sighs~ |
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Marchmadness Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271So. El Monte, California |
Wow!, made me cry. I didn't have a great relationship with my own father, not even sure whose fault that was. If he had lived past my teens we might have figured it out. |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
OH! How I love this poem.I have it printed out from before. Thank you for the repost. latearrival |
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Amaryllis Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306Mi now |
So exquistite! I love this.. very well written, portrays such heart-rending emotion without resorting to hyperbole.. wonderful  ~Amaryllis |
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easy1 Senior Member
since 2010-05-22
Posts 1209Southeastern USA |
It's a keeper... if for the roller coaster lines alone! Funny, in a way, how a squeeze of the hand is so often the most eloquent last words, especially when a person's been so hurt that he or she can no longer speak with words, or look very well with their own this-worldly eyes. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Nice to read you again Sir... nice to see a bit of the heart and soul that I respect so much for the words I've read in the past.... |
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Eldest Member
since 2010-06-15
Posts 177Alabama |
There is much personal history in this poem and I can relate in some ways. I still occasionally get caught off guard by some memory or something that reminds me of my Dad and the tears will come unexpectedly. |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
I know I've read this before, but this time it made me cry.  |
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VelvetVampress Junior Member
since 2010-04-24
Posts 26 |
it is a beautiful write. so full of heart and love. may i also print this out and share with my roomates? ~Velvet Vampress~ |
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1slick_lady Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088standing on a shadow's lace |
tender |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
such a way with words me, not being sure if my dad is alive or dead, this one hits me good but yaknow, I'm ready for that ride myself... thanks for these thoughts on a drunken 100-degree morning maybe I'll call the old fart and see if he's still kickin' |
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icebox Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 4383in the shadows |
Thank you all for the generous gift of your time and for your comments. All can never be said, yet deeply is appreciated. c. |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
Charly, this is heartwrenchingly beautiful. Just sitting here a while and letting it sink in. Love, M |
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Richy Member Elite
since 2003-05-03
Posts 3050 |
Sitting here trying my hardest to hold back the tears, but I am a weak man, and fall they did. I could write a very long reply to this but in the end it would really just say, thank you. Thank you for sharing this with us. Every now and then, you just know when you read something very special. This was one of those times. Thank you kindly fine sir, that was a very special moment reading that. Richard |
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