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Open Poetry #46
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Eldest
Member
since 2010-06-15
Posts 177
Alabama

0 posted 2010-06-17 05:49 PM



You lie there in your bed, eyes turned toward the window.
I wonder what you see?  You don't see me.
Even when I put myself in your vision.
Are you still there?  What are you thinking?
Can you think?  I ignore what others say,
especially those who want you to perform for me.
Like Pavlov's dogs, you are conditioned to give a kiss, with the proper stimulus.
But what does a kiss mean if there is no thought,
no affection behind it?
Sometimes, rarely, your eyes will focus and for
a fleeting moment I see me in your eyes.
But do you know me? Or do you just know that there is a person in your gaze?
I wish I knew.
I miss you.
I want my Momma.

© Copyright 2010 Eldest - All Rights Reserved
Amaryllis
Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306
Mi now
1 posted 2010-06-17 05:55 PM


So very sad.. so poignant.. this gets me where I live.. children are my world!  Wonderful writing.
~Amaryllis

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

2 posted 2010-06-18 08:57 AM


Interesting insight into a moment..and the thoughts behind it...
enjoyed

easy1
Senior Member
since 2010-05-22
Posts 1209
Southeastern USA
3 posted 2010-06-18 09:16 AM


LOL, although gently as per your instructions.

I have had a proverbial hand in socializing some humans (with varying success), and also some domesticated animals (generally with good success when given the required time and freedom). I wish you good fortune because it is actually something of prime importance.

Eldest
Member
since 2010-06-15
Posts 177
Alabama
4 posted 2010-06-18 09:40 AM


To give you background, my mom spent the last 8 years of her life in a nursing home with dementia, withdrawn and non-communicative.  She died Easter Sunday, gone home to glory and freed of pain.
LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
5 posted 2010-06-18 11:58 PM



Eldest that is such a touching poignant post

That touches the heart strings. well done.

Lindsay

2islander2
Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825
by the sea
6 posted 2010-06-19 04:55 AM


poignant and painful, thanks for both very personnal and universal work....An emotive compassion to your poem...

regards

yann

easy1
Senior Member
since 2010-05-22
Posts 1209
Southeastern USA
7 posted 2010-06-19 07:13 AM


My condolences to you, and may God rest your Mother's soul in peace. I went through a similar situation with my dear Mother, although there were some horrific differences involved also. I know what the blank look is in that regard, and how bad it can be to take.

The poem above I did not read clearly then, not knowing whether you meant an infant or an old person at death's door. Death is a passage, as has often been said.  

Abuse of power
is pernicious slavery.
Defend against it.

Earl Brinkman
Senior Member
since 2010-03-03
Posts 1183
Osaka, Japan
8 posted 2010-06-19 07:56 AM


I have never experienced this type of pain but your words convey to me the misery that you felt when you looked into your Mother`s eyes and wondered if she was there.  You mentioned that she passed away recently and I would like to express my condolences to you.
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
9 posted 2010-06-19 09:42 AM


Eldest, I truly am not wicked honey? Honest? I'm from Alabama so ya know I'm a gentleman?

This poem really made me think. I enjoy reading your thoughts and how well you express them.

Mysteria
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
10 posted 2010-06-19 06:05 PM


I have seen this with so many of the elderly, and their family.  It is such a sad thing to go through for the family.  Your poem went straight to the heart and the heart of the subject matter.  Well done, but so poignant.
Amaryllis
Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306
Mi now
11 posted 2010-06-19 07:09 PM


My condolences, also, eldest.. I confess when I read it I thought of it from a child`s  p.o.v..  because of the word  `momma`.. but I suppose when we are close to losing our mom we would revert to a child-like love once more.. very touching.
~Amaryllis

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