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Open Poetry #46
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LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria

0 posted 2010-06-08 01:13 AM




               Bowel Problems

Poor old Pat was sitting with his head in his hands
In fact he was feeling quite a physical wreck
His wife was quite worried at his lack of demand
Saying you had better go off to the Doc for a check

Pat thought he had better do as he was told
If it was only to appease a much nagging wife
He knew that ill-health increased when you are old
And he hoped for many more years of good life.

Arriving at the clinic the good doctor to see
He had to admit he felt a little bit nervous
For years in the past of bad health he'd been free
And was unused to using the town's doctor's service

The Doc examined Pat & said his heart sounded great
And that his blood pressure was as it should be
He said his temperature was in a quite normal state
But when you're unwell it's always best to see me.

The Doctor asked Pat if his bowels moved every day
Yes every morning at seven, Pat told him straight
The Doctor told Pat there was no need for dismay
But Pat said 'I dont get out of bed before eight.


© Copyright 2010 Lindsay P Wilson - All Rights Reserved
Mysteria
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
1 posted 2010-06-08 01:17 AM



Amaryllis
Senior Member
since 2010-05-20
Posts 1306
Mi now
2 posted 2010-06-08 02:47 AM


lol this is so irreverent it even makes me laugh seeing it on the title list!    XP
.
~A

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
3 posted 2010-06-08 11:54 AM


EUUUUWWW!

Lindsay, you're a real pisser!

2islander2
Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825
by the sea
4 posted 2010-06-08 01:15 PM


Excellent lindsay, jokes are universal, I knew this one in french too, however it kept me laughing and I thank you very much for the poem written with such talent.

have a nice day

yann

Earl Brinkman
Senior Member
since 2010-03-03
Posts 1183
Osaka, Japan
5 posted 2010-06-08 09:49 PM


Gosh I don`t know what to say!  But I can let out a chuckle.
Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA
6 posted 2010-06-09 12:00 PM


That's just wrong! Funny, but wrong. I just have two words... Alarm clock!

"We'll chase them like rats across the tundra."

whisperingwalt
Member
since 2010-04-29
Posts 240
Coquitlam, BC, Canada
7 posted 2010-06-09 01:14 AM


Very funny..ww
Kethry D
Member
since 2010-04-12
Posts 64
Australia
8 posted 2010-06-09 04:28 AM


Very funny, despite the age of the joke.

A poet must leave traces of his passing not proof.

Rene Char

Honeybunch
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115
South Africa
9 posted 2010-06-09 03:17 PM


  
LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
10 posted 2010-06-09 11:39 PM



There is nothing like a good laugh to brighten your day and I know a lot of people

who only raize a laugh at very rare occasions and I do feel for them, so to all

you wonderful people Mysteria, Amaryllis,
Balladeer, Yann, Earl, Andrew, Walt, Kethry

and Honeybunch you have made my day. When I think all you folks having a good laugh it

gives me a warm feeling inside. Many thanks folks and may God bless you all.

Lindsay

WTBAKELAR
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2008-09-09
Posts 1089
Utah, USA
11 posted 2010-06-10 12:43 PM


This was so funny I almost crapped my pants from laughing,  ( OK,  not really)

You never run out of humor.  Please keep them coming, You are a breath of fresh air,
(that is,  before 7 am)

Take care my friend,
Tracey

LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
12 posted 2010-06-11 09:27 PM



Hello to my good friend Tracey, I'd began to worry as to where you've been as I hadn't seen your name for quite a while.

I'm glad you didn't have an accident when you read my poem but if it gave you a laugh
then I am Happy Thanks for commenting.
Take care.

Lindsay

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