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Open Poetry #46
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An ending
| Open Poetry #46 |
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An ending |
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Capricious Member
since 2002-09-14
Posts 89California, USA |
- Beware all ye who enter here - This piece is a catharsis only, raw emotion with absolutely no polish or reason. As this place was the beginning, it seemed only appropriate to end it here as well. ~L I never thought the end of the world Would be so matter-of-fact, so quiet. Six words and a shrug, “I’m sorry,” half-hearted, An afterthought. No fires, no earthquakes; and yet My life crashed down around me With barely a whisper; Felled by an un-natural disaster I could not find the air to scream. A cold and tragic subscript To a ten-year love story – but you said eight -- Did I misremember? Or has it been over That long, and I never got the memo? So many times we survived on nothing And always made it work; The details were unimportant, Our most heinous disagreements Were chili beans and negative zero. Not a charmed life, exactly, but close enough To soothe the cynic in me that sneered When people talked about forever. Well -- chalk one up for the cynics Game, set and match. There is nothing left to recover No going back; you breached the point Of no return so long ago And I was none the wiser. You took the most precious and most fragile part Of me, and fouled it – soiled beyond all hope of washing, crushed beyond all recognition, Six words Are all I have left to fill my being; A sordid stain on ten years of memories. I am broken, A collection wounds jagged and bleeding There’s no such thing as full of sorrow; For sorrow is an empty thing, a void, A lack of joy or any clean emotion. I cannot say goodbye I can only say that I loved you, I’m only sorry it wasn’t enough. |
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| © Copyright 2010 Linda Anderson - All Rights Reserved | |||
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ThisDiamond Member Rara Avis
since 2002-02-22
Posts 9353Michigan, USA |
Heart-wrenching. You have written this skillfully. |
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Bastet Member
since 2010-05-07
Posts 246 |
A very interesting poem. Strong imagery and emotion. And quote from Dante's Inferno is very much to the point. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
oh...no. sigh and nod I'm pretty sure it was eight. (Eight turned sideways is ...infinity?) And I want to believe I'm reading too much into this. I really want to believe that. Have my hugs, my love, but no critique except...hope. If you need an ear, I'm here. (You can still call me yanno.) Ever your fan and friend, k |
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Robbie New Member
since 2007-04-08
Posts 8 |
Try to find strength in the knowledge that there are others who love you. Great, heartfelt poem. Not polished? I'm very jealous. |
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Andrew Scott Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558Redlands,CA,USA |
A very strong and emotional piece. I'm sorry for the circumstances that may have led to its writing, but appreciate the quality and the content. Peace to you and yours. "We'll chase them like rats across the tundra." |
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whisperingwalt Member
since 2010-04-29
Posts 240Coquitlam, BC, Canada |
The strength of your sorrow made this a very good poem but heavy on the heart. May heart find healing and your tears turn to laughter. WW |
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Eterne Member
since 2010-07-21
Posts 75Quebec, Canada |
Yes, it may does feel like the end of the world, doesn't it? Very nice poem, lots of emotions... |
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Eldest Member
since 2010-06-15
Posts 177Alabama |
such a magnificent expression of pain! You have my empathy, pain shared is pain halved. |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
a crushing scribe..for what are crushed trust, dreams, hopes.... it is truly sad that all too often Love alone is not enough... a rant..perhaps, but even as a rant it stands well on its own. my best.. to tomorrow |
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Kaoru
since 2003-06-07
Posts 3892where the wild flowers grow |
The honestly, however painful, is necessary to heal. Enjoyed this quite a bit, actually.  |
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JerryPat Senior Member
since 2010-10-30
Posts 1991Louisiana/America |
Raw is better most of the time than polished poetry, Capricious. Raw is life. Polished is life in a showcase window. This was excellent writing and in-depth examination of battered emotions. Stay raw. . . . and the Raven said, %!~#&(&#!$! |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
I am broken, A collection wounds jagged and bleeding There’s no such thing as full of sorrow; For sorrow is an empty thing, a void, A lack of joy or any clean emotion. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This is heartbreaking, you've expressed so much raw emotion so eloquently. Reads like an open wound waiting to heal. I am somewhat speachless, it hurts and still I applaud you for writing down your thoughts from a very deep and painful place. ~blessings~ |
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Prasad Nataraj Senior Member
since 2008-05-29
Posts 1149Bangalore,India |
Powerful,emotional, fine writing this. "Hardwork pays in the long run" |
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