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LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion

0 posted 2010-04-13 11:43 AM


Quietly applying my craft to tease
Fairest damsels with trembling knees,
I eagerly post my latest new schtick
To Open Poetry Forum 46.

Hastily I edit the mistake I made,
Then post again before it’s too late.
Oh, wait! I misspelled that word,
Another edit to correct a verb.

At last, it’s done, the poem is grand.
But wait!  That line!  They’ll not understand!
Quickly I edit a new line in
Then hastily post the poem again.

And now I wait for the acclamations,
F5. Refresh. Oh, lamentations!
The title is wrong!  What was I thinking?
My typing skills reflect my drinking.

Another repost, this one the last,
I breathe relief as I settle back.
Surely the ladies will respond in swoon,
As I silently lurk within the room.

Poets are posting, awaiting their due,
My poem is slipping down the queue.
I worked so hard, how can this be?
Not one response acknowledging me.

This poem I worked so hard to pen
Is being ignored by women and men.
Other poems instead push mine thru
Into the oblivion that is Page 2.

Perhaps I should read my poem again,
Maybe I missed with my intent.
What’s this?!  Egad!  How did I miss?
It isn’t ‘Deer I wanted to kiss!


I wrote this for Toerag.....


© Copyright 2010 Michael Waterman - All Rights Reserved
latearrival
Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499
Florida
1 posted 2010-04-13 02:37 PM


LngJhnAg, it is so good to see you not only posting again but responding to a lot of others. You have talent and have been missed. I understand the above and all the editing we have to do.For some reason mistakes do not stand out until we click that button and then, oh gosh, another mistake is found.  latearrival

Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA
2 posted 2010-04-13 06:24 PM


ROTFLMAO... I never saw the ending coming... perfect! And so easy to relate to. Been there done that... oh, ahh, not that kissing thing.
PS... Thanks for the read and write on HMS Regret. I'm sure an old salty dog such as you has seen that ship a time or two. Peace to you and your's my friend.

"We'll chase them like rats across the tundra."

Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
3 posted 2010-04-13 07:57 PM


"This poem I worked so hard to pen
Is being ignored by women and men.
Other poems instead push mine thru
Into the oblivion that is Page 2."
_____________________________________
Oh I can relate to that!  
And you're a talented poet so I would be surprised to see any piece of yours ignored! And I loved the ending LOL I can't wait to see Balladeer's reply!

2islander2
Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825
by the sea
4 posted 2010-04-15 02:54 AM


hello LngJhnAg
this is totally delightful, the real questionning of the poet who posts and hopes, all the poem is welle expressed and sounds very juste (or exact)...You point out a very credible feeling and your poem has both talents, to intrigue and to make smile...

have a nice day

yann

Prasad Nataraj
Senior Member
since 2008-05-29
Posts 1149
Bangalore,India
5 posted 2010-04-15 08:19 AM


true of every poet who puts in a lot of effort to express his thoughts. Surely few comments brighten the day. Nice poem.

"Hardwork pays in the long run"

Chalmette Guy
Senior Member
since 2009-03-11
Posts 1257
Louisiana
6 posted 2010-04-15 08:35 AM


LOL
I like this. And relate.

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
7 posted 2010-04-15 08:46 AM


Thank you one and all for those very gracious comments.

I tend to write in a light-hearted mood; allying Thalia with Erato.  However, Erato, always the fickle one, sometimes betrays her alliance and joins the alliance between Calliope and Melpomene.  Perhaps (as I'm sure you have experienced with your own Muses) a sombre mood encourages that alliance.  I take heart in those times, offer the sacrifice they demand, and await Thalia's inevitable return.

hmmm... sounds like inspiration for a poem, doesn't it?

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
8 posted 2010-04-15 09:08 AM


Geesh...sounds to me like you could have been sitting there, watching Toerag's attempt to write a "pome". No doubt he goes through those same steps. Alongside him he has a dictionary, I'm sure, (never mind that it's Russian) and Roget's Thesaurus, which comes in handy when ants get too close to his spilled beer foam. When someone once asked him to write romantically, he asked why would anyone want to tickle a Roman!? Go figure...

You are in fine form, sailor, back with innovative thoughts written with a clever pen and the humor we have missed for too long. Sail on!


ken206573
Member
since 2008-10-14
Posts 487

9 posted 2010-04-16 11:29 AM


I as well can relate to this ALOT I assure you. I really enjoyed your poem and the way it shows us our anguish, love and hard work we put into each word.


suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
10 posted 2010-04-16 10:56 PM


ROFL... I don't think my poems will ever cause a swoon (unless disgust gives the vapors? *G*) but I loved every line of this... even if you did try to blame sweet Toe for the sloppy kiss YOU planted on Deer! LOL

This makes me think of the days you spent rowing across the Atlantic... How glad I am you gave your oars a rest and picked up the pen! *S*

Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
11 posted 2010-04-21 09:52 AM


Yea, I'm swooning....like a 20 scotch nite and the bed is spinning...think I'll puke....LOL
Toerag
Member Ascendant
since 1999-07-29
Posts 5622
Ala bam a
12 posted 2010-04-22 07:37 AM


And I'll have you know Balladeer, my "Dictionary" for rednecks is not 'wrote' in Russian!!!
Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
13 posted 2010-04-22 12:51 PM


What could be better than a poem that makes you smile.
                                  Ida

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
14 posted 2010-04-22 07:07 PM


AHA! I suspected the title was wearing
some longjohns instead of suspenders...

It's good to have you home again!


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