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Open Poetry #46
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Magnus
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since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

0 posted 2010-03-21 09:55 AM



A roaring fire to warm the limbs
with wine to churn the inner soul.
As candle light does bring from dim
these words I write and slowly scroll.

From mountains high above the plain
to damsels in distress of beasts.
To rails that sing the soulful train
and hardy meals that feed the feasts.

The sandy shore of shadows walk
upon the grains of life in flow.
To whispered words of pillow talk
and visions of a gown in flow.

Where shields do carry to battle
the heart and courage of one man.
Where sabers drawn bring to rattle
the din of war, an evil plan.

As romance comes into the dreams
among the fall that roars and flows
over the rocks of clearest streams
now cold to touch from melted snows.

Of hearts and souls and saddened tales,
of ladies born to give their all.
To men that fought and manned the rails
of cannons fired in need the ball.

Where lighthouses shone the haven
for ships to land and find the maids.
Before the tap of the raven
beyond the blinds and shuttered shades.

The candle burns on borrowed wick
as time draws nigh this weary soul
to curve the quill and trim the stick
before the last of bells then toll

© Copyright 2010 Barry J. Tackett - All Rights Reserved
Klassy Lassy
Member Elite
since 2005-06-28
Posts 2187
Oregon
1 posted 2010-03-21 10:54 AM


Always, the romance of life shines in your poetry, Barry, as well as the challenge of getting through it. It's like looking at a panorama of time reading this poem.  It's magnificent, yet the last stanza leaves me feeling wistfulness for the endurance and joy of youth. Beautiful, truthful, and elegant poetry, in a dream-like presentation!  

KL  

Magnus
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Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
2 posted 2010-03-21 11:11 AM


Looking at what I have written,  it might
have been more appropriate to have a less
somber taste to the poem at it's ending.

I thank you for your honest assessment...
That, in itself is worth a king's
ransom...

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
3 posted 2010-03-21 04:55 PM


quote:
As romance comes into the dreams
among the fall that roars and flows
over the rocks of clearest streams
now cold to touch from melted snows.



Masterfully expressed verses, dear Barry.

Love,
Margherita

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2010-03-21 05:02 PM


I
remember
this...






vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
5 posted 2010-03-21 05:38 PM


nice
jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
6 posted 2010-03-21 05:39 PM


Absolutely cool my friend...always enjoy your stuff.


j

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
7 posted 2010-03-22 02:49 AM


Excellent writing, Barry.
                          Ida

Denise
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Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

8 posted 2010-04-04 06:20 AM


Very well done, Barry! I wouldn't change a thing!
Klassy Lassy
Member Elite
since 2005-06-28
Posts 2187
Oregon
9 posted 2010-04-05 02:33 AM


I would not change the way this poem ends, either.  It settles poignantly and powerfully in humanity's hope, and it comes down to a personal level in my heart--  I just see that mortality is to be reckoned, and we all come to that which will define us sooner or later..."to curve the quill and trim the stick."  I think it is life.   Thank you, Magnus.


[This message has been edited by Klassy Lassy (04-05-2010 04:39 PM).]

The Lady
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-12-26
Posts 7634
The Southwest
10 posted 2010-04-05 11:39 PM




every word shines Barry! you are  a true poet.

steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

11 posted 2010-04-06 11:22 AM


beautifully done...love this line:

"The candle burns on borrowed wick"

LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
12 posted 2010-04-08 12:25 PM



Yes great powm Barry, a delight to read.

Take care.

Lindsay

Honeybunch
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115
South Africa
13 posted 2010-04-08 08:38 AM


Great write and certainly perfect as it is.

Helen

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
14 posted 2010-04-08 04:09 PM


Nicely written, Magnus.  I especially liked the last verse, so I have to disagree with your regret.  I do not disagree with how well this poem was written.
Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
15 posted 2010-04-12 03:12 AM


Love it just the way it is.
                     Ida

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
16 posted 2010-04-19 06:38 PM


Very nice...Jame
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