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Open Poetry #46
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Zeigeist
Member
since 2009-12-09
Posts 311
Michigan

0 posted 2010-01-31 08:40 PM



Smooth Pillow

I feel myself suffocating,
Each day a exercise in survival.
I sense thre are hands holding mine,
but I can't raise my eyes up.
The air in my life
is just confused random noise.
Bruise's on my face
from society's slapping,
paint me guilty for all to see.
Every step forward I struggle to make
is ridiculed backward for two.

I feel myself suffocating.

The smooth feel of the pillow,
the last comfort I will ever have
In this life.

Zeitgeist

© Copyright 2010 Zeigeist - All Rights Reserved
viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
1 posted 2010-01-31 11:48 PM


Cheer up, buddy.

The sunlight is still there for the taking.

People are dumb, I don't like them much either.


This was a good write.

Fall in love early, fall in love often.

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
2 posted 2010-02-01 01:35 PM


Zeigeist - I agree, the sunlight is there for the taking, it comes up every morning. Grab it and run with it...

BC

Zeigeist
Member
since 2009-12-09
Posts 311
Michigan
3 posted 2010-02-01 08:45 PM


Thanks for the replies. I appreciate them very much.

Z.

KatVern17
Junior Member
since 2009-05-07
Posts 33

4 posted 2010-02-01 09:17 PM


Hey Z. I know that feeling. Cheer up, and hope things will be okay.

KV


Juju
Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
5 posted 2010-02-01 10:14 PM


Yeah, I know dat feeling. Thats why I moved to another state.

-Juju

-"So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thoughts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts " Silent all these Years, Tori Amos

Alison
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!
6 posted 2010-02-14 11:49 PM


You know, I don't know about you, but I hate people to tell me to "cheer up" when I write a poem that is a bit on the dark side.  I think we all light and dark in us.  Expressing the darker sides of our personalities is healthy.  That's how I see it anyway and I am glad that you shared this with us.

So don't bother cheering up - just accept the good and bad times - the dark and light times - the sad and happy times ... and keep on writing.

Alison

Juju
Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
7 posted 2010-02-14 11:51 PM


HEy I am a chica of aCTION! Man

-Juju

-Juju

-"So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thoughts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts " Silent all these Years, Tori Amos

Zeigeist
Member
since 2009-12-09
Posts 311
Michigan
8 posted 2010-02-17 11:14 PM


Again thanks to everyone for your concern and your kind replies. Im fine... its just really the style i write in most often.

Zeigeist.

Earl Brinkman
Senior Member
since 2010-03-03
Posts 1183
Osaka, Japan
9 posted 2010-05-04 09:05 AM


Your poetry stands out.  It does seem at times that society is slapping us in the face and the only respite is the pillow at night and the world of dreams.
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
10 posted 2010-05-04 08:31 PM


Fine writing...James
LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
11 posted 2010-05-05 10:25 PM



Dont feel sorry for yourself Zeitgeist, count all your blessings and I'll bet there

are a lot more pluses than minuses. Always remember my friend life is what YOU make it.
now it is up to you. Good luck.

Lindsay

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