navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #46 » Distortion
Open Poetry #46
Post A Reply Post New Topic Distortion Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
wicked
Junior Member
since 2010-01-29
Posts 22
Florida, USA

0 posted 2010-01-29 09:19 PM


wicked


Back to back and eye to eye
heart to heart we laugh and cry

Step by step we lose our way
Word by word forget to say

Kiss by kiss we say goodbye
Truth by truth we live a lie

Hour by hour times run short
Piece by piece our lives distort

Gift by gift eachother take
Beat by beat our hearts will break

Fall by fall we learn to fly
Breath by breath we live to die

Cut by cut our wounds will heal
Pain by pain forget to feel

Day by day we will not wait
For Love by love we learn to hate


copyright 2010 LD


I am that I am,
And that makes it me.
I float like a rock
But I sting like a bee.


[This message has been edited by wicked (01-30-2010 02:19 PM).]

© Copyright 2010 Lexie DeLaRue - All Rights Reserved
Mysteria
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
1 posted 2010-01-29 11:11 PM


A very impressive first posting indeed Lexie.  

Check your email for a special greeting from the forums to you.  Please ensure you have read and adhere to the guidelines of the site, and enjoy all the forums.  Welcome!


    

Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
2 posted 2010-01-30 01:38 AM


Very impressive indeed, Wicked. (You might check the spelling in that forth verse) Welcome to the sight, I love the see new talent.
                             Ida

Helen Gabelli
New Member
since 2010-01-29
Posts 3

3 posted 2010-01-30 07:43 AM


For me, I learned what love is because of hate.
wicked
Junior Member
since 2010-01-29
Posts 22
Florida, USA
4 posted 2010-01-30 07:38 PM


thanks.

I wrote this one because everything contradicts itself in some way, but in contradiction, in the irony of it, there is completion.

I am that I am,
And that makes it me.
I float like a rock
But I sting like a bee.

kindredspirit
Member
since 2009-05-19
Posts 156

5 posted 2010-02-04 01:57 PM


beautiful. simple, yet profound. and yes, i love the irony.
JJazsmena
New Member
since 2010-02-04
Posts 1

6 posted 2010-02-04 05:57 PM


Simply Beautiful... I love it!!
Earl Brinkman
Senior Member
since 2010-03-03
Posts 1183
Osaka, Japan
7 posted 2010-03-28 01:00 AM


Clever use of repetition thoughout but perhaps the work may have been better if it were expanded and broken up into stanzas.
Andrew Scott
Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558
Redlands,CA,USA
8 posted 2010-03-31 12:07 PM


Most excellent. I like the feel and the flow.  I bow to you and yours.
Peace... and by that, I mean Peace.

"We'll chase them like rats across the tundra."

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #46 » Distortion

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary