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Open Poetry #46
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viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.

0 posted 2010-01-17 02:27 AM


You asked me what I did for a living
I felt like an idiot,
being out of work
like so much of the country.

I told you
I've driven forklifts
I've welded for oil rigs and gold mines
I've installed auto glass
mixed paint, and pushed carts.
But, I'm currently out of the job
seeing as how my last boss
decided to stop paying me.

And I don't work for free.

You laughed and interested yourself
a little further in me.
I welcomed the warmth
and sank into your eyes
like a heavy bowl in water.

As the beauty ran over my edges
slowly filling the void
submerging me,
keeping me from sleep,
I thought of you
and smiled.



Fall in love early, fall in love often.

[This message has been edited by viking_metal (01-17-2010 02:58 AM).]

© Copyright 2010 Paul Weisbrod - All Rights Reserved
Alison
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!
1 posted 2010-01-17 03:06 AM


Paul,

I think some of the things that I like and appreciate about your poetry is you write about life.  We see it through your eyes - and you write about a social slice of life that you let us in on.  And I like that about your poetry and about you.

A

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
2 posted 2010-01-17 03:22 AM


My dearest Alison,

You flatter me endlessly. I'll get a big head one of these days, if you keep on like this. I appreciate your comments to no end, and I'm glad I seem to have won you as a dedicated reader. You are all too kind, and you keep me writing, because god knows the people that I write about don't get to read these, at least you folks do.


Why are we awake? It's nearly 2:30 in the morning my time. Hooligans, surely.


Paul

Fall in love early, fall in love often.

Klassy Lassy
Member Elite
since 2005-06-28
Posts 2187
Oregon
3 posted 2010-01-17 03:43 AM


I like your image of a bowl submerging in water, and the void filling.  The overflow of warmth can be as powerful as a waterfall and just as beautiful.  

Possibility hints of new tomorrows.  Makes me want to dream a little deeper, too.  ~KL

Alison
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!
4 posted 2010-01-17 03:55 AM


I think I might be around three hours behind you time-wise.

But, I am a nightowl - hence the snowy_nightowl email.

A

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
5 posted 2010-01-17 08:54 AM


Klassy... Thanks! I am glad you enjoyed it.

Aliboo, well, you're from Alaska, eh? That would pit you three hours behind me. Hoot hoot...

Fall in love early, fall in love often.

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
6 posted 2010-01-17 01:23 PM


"As the beauty ran over my edges
slowly filling the void
submerging me,
keeping me from sleep,
I thought of you
and smiled."

perfection!

really loved this part...

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
7 posted 2010-01-17 08:06 PM


Thanks so very much, dearest sueSEA.
Paul

Fall in love early, fall in love often.

unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477

8 posted 2010-01-20 11:51 PM


You never fail to impress me.

smooches,
H

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
9 posted 2010-01-21 03:47 AM


Thanks so much. Smooches received, over and out.


I'm flattered.

Fall in love early, fall in love often.

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