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haibun: contentment
| Open Poetry #47 |
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haibun: contentment |
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flash Member
since 2010-11-28
Posts 213miami beach, florida |
Moonlit night. A time for romance. Lovers holding hands. But I am alone in my room, having broken off a long-term relationship. A sad moment for some--but with the beautiful evening unfolding, I welcome the solitude the warmth of my own hands. . . winter moon |
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| © Copyright 2011 al fogel - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
Dear Al, I see you and feel this contentment. You surrender to what is and you know you are one with All there is, thus not needing to linger in the pain. A sparkling little gem! Love, Margherita |
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Lori Grosser Rhoden Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202Fair to middlin' of nowhere |
Margherita is so elequent in her replies that I think I'll just ditto that. Enjoyed Lori |
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JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
Not too many people take on the haibun. When I do I tend to get much more involved. I like this shorter, concise way of doing it. ~~ "Government is not reason; it is not eloquent. It is force. Like fire, it is a dangerous servant and a fearful master." --George Washington ~~ |
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flash Member
since 2010-11-28
Posts 213miami beach, florida |
Thank you Margherita, Jerry , Lori: Margherita: Yes, it was "moonlit night", a time for romance, lovers holding hands under the moon--in stark contrast to holding only my "own hands". It would seem to paint a poignant portrayal of sadness, lonliness. But I was content being alone--welcoming the solitude--and quite at peace. I guess as our life comes to an end and the casket is lowered into our final resting place, are we all not "alone?"--holding our "own hands". Lori: Glad you liked and shared Margherita's sentiments. Jerry: Thanks for your generous comments. Yes, I know what you mean. I've been writing haibun for about 6 months but in the beginning I wanted to pack as much prose in as possible--until after reading up on the form, the experts say to leave a lot for the reader to contemplate. Get the Reader involved--not the poet. Show and don't tell. I try to follow this Chinese proverb when writing haibun, haiku, senryu: "Tell me and I will forget, show me and I may remember, involve me and I will understand."--Chinese Proverb flash |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Nice...James |
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