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dreamgal
Member

since 2011-03-17

Posts 442

0 posted 2011-05-09 03:18 PM

To unlock a heart, thats
been so tightly closed.
To help them feel
something that they
havent before.
To allow them to
surrender, and then not
run away, such unselfish
love, is a rarity today.
To stay by there side, when
there not at there best,
is truly a gift that one
can possess.
To help them feel "safe"
to just be themself,
to expose all there demons
they've kept to themselves.
This is what unconditional
love is about, to not
run away when the going
gets rough.
And this is my gift
that i give to you,
my lover, my friend
I accept you...

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

1 posted 2011-05-09 03:37 PM

To accept without reservation is something many have a problem with. This poem addressing that face very well.

Dreamgal, I will take you at your word about the critiquing. There are a few places you need to correct, mostly grammar.

To unlock a heart, thats
To unlock a heart, that's

havent before.
haven't before.

To stay by there side, when
To stay by their side, when

there not at there best,
they're not at their best,

to just be themself
to just be themselves

to expose all there demons
to expose all their demons

Dreamgal, I hope you take these instances where corrections could be made in the way that they were given. I only want to see you do your best.

~ I think we should only read books that wound and stab us.-Kafka ~

dreamgal
Member

since 2011-03-17

Posts 442

2 posted 2011-05-09 04:42 PM

Oh no worrrries Jery. I should learn to prove read b4 i hit sent. Thanx for letting me no

Dreamtgirl
>(

dreamgal
Member

since 2011-03-17

Posts 442

3 posted 2011-05-09 05:17 PM

Jerry,

I hope you know i was only joking with you in the above post Lol.
I definetly should proofread lol.

Thanks!
Dreamgal

faithmairee
Senior Member

since 2011-01-05

Posts 1441
Poe Haven, USA

4 posted 2011-05-09 05:45 PM

this is such a loving and heart-felt poem...the way you ended it was perfect...very lovely poem, gal

There must be a poem in here somewhere.

dreamgal
Member

since 2011-03-17

Posts 442

5 posted 2011-05-09 05:50 PM

Thank you so much Faith for your kind comments. I always love reading your poetry as well.

Dreamgal

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

6 posted 2011-05-09 06:24 PM

Dear Dreamgal, you are beautifully aware of the value of unconditional love and it is a joy to read your acceptance.

To apply the editing suggested by Jerry, you can click on the notebook/pencil icon in your post and modify the text and then send it again. This is possible within the 24 hours after posting it.

Love,
Margherita

"Love is the One who masters all things;
I am mastered totally by Love."
(Rumi)

dreamgal
Member

since 2011-03-17

Posts 442

7 posted 2011-05-09 07:20 PM

Thank you Margherita, for always being so kind.
And yes, i am actually aware of the editing button, your a sweetheart for telling me though.
Thank you again!
Love, Dreamgal

2islander2
Member Ascendant

since 2008-03-12

Posts 6825
by the sea

8 posted 2011-05-10 04:12 AM

this is a so loving poem, an adorable message; and a vivid truth, enjoyed it,

yann

dreamgal
Member

since 2011-03-17

Posts 442

9 posted 2011-05-10 07:34 AM

Thank you Yann i appreciate your comments.

Dreamgal

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