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Open Poetry #47
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Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast

0 posted 2011-05-04 12:51 PM



on those perhaps colored mornings
when you leave the veils behind
and give my eyes room to wrap around
the sighs of your woman skin slowly

like threads around the finger ends
to make memory kinds of sounds
those unforgettable knots tied down
lest they slip off from your willing

and become just strings attached to limbs
which you say are helpless to manage
the directions they really need to go
versus where they are wanting to go deeper

and then those verses are our poems again

_____________

daark

© Copyright 2011 ©Dark 2k - All Rights Reserved
JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
1 posted 2011-05-04 01:04 PM


Okay. I liked the hell out of this one. Your amazing talent with wordplay never fails to impress me. I may not always comment, because sometimes, quite frankly, I don't understand enough of it to give an opinion. I think I got the thread of this one.

Love. Love these two lines in particular . . . Says much . . .

"those unforgettable knots tied down
lest they slip off from your willing"

~ I went to a restaurant that serves "breakfast at any time" / I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance. ~

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
2 posted 2011-05-04 01:30 PM


thank you JP...
OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
3 posted 2011-05-04 02:53 PM


Scintillating, Dark.

Owl

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
4 posted 2011-05-04 05:13 PM


lady Owl

thank you for looking in


Alison
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!
5 posted 2011-05-05 01:14 AM


Well, maybe it's this one I'll take with me.  Oh hell, I'll take both.

Thank you, dear friend of mine.

Ali-san

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
6 posted 2011-05-05 06:25 AM


lil ali-san, thanks babe
steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

7 posted 2011-05-08 10:23 PM


loved your clever twists on the use of the parts of speech in novel ways...a pleasure to read...nice
Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
8 posted 2011-05-09 04:10 AM


I think this is hauntingly beautiful, dear D.

Love,
Margherita

ice
Member Elite
since 2003-05-17
Posts 3404
Pennsylvania
9 posted 2011-05-09 05:40 AM


Excellent poetry--Topic,and form..thank you
Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
10 posted 2011-05-09 05:53 AM


steavenr, thanks amigo

_______________

ms mar, thanks lady friend


_________________

ice, thank you much

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
11 posted 2011-05-09 04:13 PM



/main/forumdisplay.cgi?action=displayarchive&number=91&topic=001696
.

A little blast from the past...

You knew I would enjoy this one...

  

.


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