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Open Poetry #47
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Syuri Sky
New Member
since 2011-03-28
Posts 3
Knoxville, TN

0 posted 2011-04-06 03:32 AM


Through these flushing tears,
only one voice can I hear.
Will you save me this time?
Is it worth the impossible climb?

I see Im getting no where.
You shattered all this to bits and pieces with just one tare.
Can't you see these battle wounds that we share, that I bare?
Its true I hurt too!
I swear this is the last time that I will ever be here!
Can't you tell in my voice that i am real sincere?

Don't try to stop me...


© Copyright 2011 Whitney Delaney - All Rights Reserved
Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
1 posted 2011-04-06 05:08 AM


Dear Whitney, welcome to Pip!

It's difficult to have clarity in "desperate times" and through the tears, I agree.

So, between the secret hope of being saved and the invitation to not be stopped in your intent, things will have to slowly evolve into a serene understanding of what is.

Enjoyed your first offering.

Love,
Margherita

dreamgal
Member
since 2011-03-17
Posts 442

2 posted 2011-04-06 07:51 AM


I really enjoyed this. It was very dramatic and really captured my attention. I look forward to reading more from you.
Welcome to pip!

Dreamgal

Syuri Sky
New Member
since 2011-03-28
Posts 3
Knoxville, TN
3 posted 2011-04-06 12:01 PM


Thank you all for your wonderful compliments! I enjoyed hearing from you. Best wishes to you both!


steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

4 posted 2011-04-06 10:32 PM


welcome to PiP...interesting write and very lovely name...syuri (does that not mean pretty?)
Syuri Sky
New Member
since 2011-03-28
Posts 3
Knoxville, TN
5 posted 2011-04-06 11:48 PM


Yes it does, and thank you ever so much for the compliment
Britt_Brat
Junior Member
since 2008-03-05
Posts 37
Knoxville, TN
6 posted 2011-04-07 12:13 PM


very pretty i like and i know where ur coming from

Lost & wondering till I'm found

ebonygirl
Member Elite
since 2011-07-14
Posts 2000
California U.S.A
7 posted 2011-08-25 05:12 PM


Hi Syuri Sky,
Read your poem, intense, summer is almost over,...
just wondering... how things are going now.
Smiles,
ebonygirl

JerryPat2
Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975
South Louisiana
8 posted 2011-08-25 08:05 PM


Welcome! Dramatic poetry!

~ Man who stands on toilet is high on pot. ~

Juju
Member Elite
since 2003-12-29
Posts 3429
In your dreams
9 posted 2011-08-25 09:52 PM


welcome

-Juju

-"So you found a girl
Who thinks really deep thoughts
What's so amazing about really deep thoughts " Silent all these Years, Tori Amos

JL
Member Ascendant
since 2004-04-01
Posts 6128
Texas, USA
10 posted 2011-08-26 10:36 AM


"I swear this is the last time that I will ever be here!
Can't you tell in my voice that i am real sincere?

Don't try to stop me..."


Desperate times for sure.
Nice write Syuri Sky.


JL



ebonygirl
Member Elite
since 2011-07-14
Posts 2000
California U.S.A
11 posted 2011-08-26 10:15 PM


Syuri Sky,
Welcome to pip, you are in the right place.
Look forward to reading more of your poems.
Enjoyed your poem, intense.
Ms. E

Paul Wilson
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2002-07-07
Posts 4711
United States
12 posted 2011-08-27 07:59 PM


Syuri...Welcome to our family of friends. I hope to read many more of your poems during your stay here. Thanks for sharing with us this poem...Paul

~~To share my poems with you is to share my heart with you~~
Paul

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
13 posted 2011-08-27 09:57 PM


Cool write, my friend...right to the point and declarative!!

j.


Angel4aKing
Senior Member
since 2006-09-27
Posts 1372
USA
14 posted 2011-08-28 03:28 AM


Interesting , the words almost spoke to me , we all hurt and we all heal eventually it's a process.

~~~kingsangel~~~

ebonygirl
Member Elite
since 2011-07-14
Posts 2000
California U.S.A
15 posted 2011-08-28 06:48 PM


Welcome to pip Syuri Sky,
Enjoyed your poem and I know will enjoy more,
ebonygirl

tracie66
Member Elite
since 2000-01-18
Posts 4713
Australia
16 posted 2011-12-26 06:52 AM


welcome to PIP - wonderful first post

Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe
                        — W. E. Channing



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