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Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

0 posted 2011-03-21 04:45 PM

I couldn't pass by this pregnancy of mind
marking the path with the pitch and clamor
of music gone wild.

No, Couldn't hold my breath long enough
to swim under the clouds
holding the promise of thunder,

or the tree-lined silk of cascading thought,
whose sound-waves troubled the wind
with a harmony that filled the rivers
and drowned the paper and plastic
of more than I know of time,
hiding the glorious moon with its smoldering
wet halo.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

1 posted 2011-03-21 05:58 PM

Such a poem of contradictions, but I know you purposefully included the contradictions.

"to swim under the clouds
holding the promise of thunder,"

Swimming beneath clouds could be seen as flying, except the promise of thunder makes one think of water, i.e. maybe the birth canal?

"or the tree-lined silk of cascading thought,
whose sound-waves troubled the wind"

Again, you are having cascading thought, which means your thoughts are a jumble, and in the next line you say that the thoughts are bothering the wind. I like that very much.

"hiding the glorious moon with its smoldering
wet halo."

And yet again we have the moon being hidden by a smoldering halo. How a halo could smolder, I don't know, but it is defiantly interesting to think on.

Love this poem.

~ Look hard behind you and you'll be able to maneuver around the pitfalls ahead of you. ~

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

2 posted 2011-03-21 06:07 PM

Hi Jerry...I had to make up the full moon of the other night because it was so stormy here...thus the imagery and the title. Thanks for commenting...I'm glad you liked it.

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

3 posted 2011-03-21 06:14 PM

Now that I know everything I said sounds ridiculous.

~ Look hard behind you and you'll be able to maneuver around the pitfalls ahead of you. ~

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

4 posted 2011-03-21 06:16 PM

Jerry...Not ridiculous at all...made it sound as though my poem was mysterious.

Richy
Member Elite

since 2003-05-03

Posts 3050

5 posted 2011-03-22 05:03 AM

Dear Martie, just like the moon you are the most shining thing in our heavens... this is so amazing its one of my all time favorites of yours.

Even your lovely picture looks like the shimmering moon against the midnight blue of the evening sky.

Lovely, lovely.

Richard

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-11-07

Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa

6 posted 2011-03-22 11:55 AM

This is so exquisitely Martie – feeling the presence of that glorious full moon and seeing its beauty through the fingertips of your soul although it was hidden by the wild storm, whose power and magnificence you described with Martie-wonder. You buy the most excellent of word paint-brushes!

Owl

EmmaRose
Senior Member

since 2011-03-02

Posts 1376
Midwest

7 posted 2011-03-22 03:05 PM

Truly mystical and marvelous.
Your marquise moon is mesmerizing

Margherita
Member Seraphic

since 2003-02-08

Posts 22236
Eternity

8 posted 2011-03-22 08:03 PM

And how your mind reflects the moon is simply stunning, dear Martie.

Love,
Margherita

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

9 posted 2011-03-26 06:18 PM

Ah Sissie...we couldn't see the fullness of the perigee of the moon the other night either...until very early in the morning after the clouds had cleared just a bit, and I only know that because it was pretty much directly overhead and cast a glorious light for the boys to visit nature by...but it was cool enough I didn't go out to gaze upon its fullness.

But the way you missed it...wow...a

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

10 posted 2011-03-26 07:11 PM

Richy...You have a way of making me feel very special.  Thank you.

Diana...You knew just what I was painting and explained it to me perfectly.  Thank you for your understanding heart.

EmmaRose...Thanks for all the memorable M's

Margherita...I still wish I'd seen the moon in the sky.  I guess all we see comes through our minds and is changed by the climate there.

Sissie...My girl won't visit nature in the right place when it's raining. Thanks for stopping by to see my moon.

ethome
Member Patricius

since 2000-05-14

Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

11 posted 2011-03-26 08:12 PM

Always appreciate your poetry very much Martie.
These lines really intrigue me...

"with a harmony that filled the rivers
and drowned the paper and plastic
of more than I know of time,
hiding the glorious moon with its smoldering
wet halo."

I remain intrigued and assuming my own moon in mind.

Lovely work!

Eric

true love never looks after it's own interests

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius

since 2009-10-10

Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere

12 posted 2011-03-26 08:49 PM

I read your words and just marvel at them and then I'm at a loss for my own.

Lori

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

13 posted 2011-03-27 03:09 PM

Eric and Lori...thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment. I appreciate it.

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