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steavenr
Member Elite

since 2003-11-17

Posts 4058

0 posted 2011-03-07 09:26 PM

I need to write with small words tonight
to say things in clarity by being precise
to count revision not in concision
needing not to edit nor cloud my vision

I need to write with words so very slight and fine
lingering not for depth nor meanings so sublime
to distract or dither with phrases shallow
by settling for wide when better is narrow

I need to write with words that speak my thoughts
to seek what can be learned but never taught
understanding with an open mind's brigade
of warrior-verses seeking word-parades

at attention, with attention, getting the same
as I prime the think-pump for lyrics without fame

small words, my mind bemoans, "meaningful, small words"

JerryPat2
Member Laureate

since 2011-02-06

Posts 16975
South Louisiana

1 posted 2011-03-07 09:36 PM

Damn, I absolutely loved this, my friend. "Meaningful small words." Yesss! You took the reader with you on your quest, and we are the better for it. Wonderful poetry.

~ Your writing is one of my guilty pleasures...more art than just words.-- steavenr ~

twistedpup
Member

since 2011-02-25

Posts 115

2 posted 2011-03-07 09:49 PM

i really liked this poem. it was facinating the way you used a common phrase through out the entire poem.
great job.

*hugs*

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

3 posted 2011-03-07 10:34 PM

Oh, such tumultuous frustration!

The last line kicks ass, too.

and I totally love the word-parades.

Excellent conveyance there, you did what you sought to do.

I'll use small words though and just say:

I love it.

steavenr
Member Elite

since 2003-11-17

Posts 4058

4 posted 2011-03-08 12:28 PM

Jerry, thank you for the glowing comment.  Sure glad you enjoyed it.

twistedpup, I do appreciate you taking the time to read and leave a comment.  Here's to common phrases!

serenity, "tumultuous  frustration"...is that like 'boisterous burden' or 'riotous exasperation' or 'uncontrolled annoyance'

...oh, and thank you for keying in on "word-parades" ...I simply cannot resist the urge to use hyphenated words some times
...thanks for the 'small word' compliment

martiniat8
Senior Member

since 2003-06-21

Posts 897
Prague, Bohemia, Czech Republic

5 posted 2011-03-08 01:17 AM

I love reading about writing, and so well phrased. Well done

OwlSA
Member Rara Avis

since 2005-11-07

Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa

6 posted 2011-03-08 05:19 PM

I, too, absolutely love this perfect little cameo, Steaven.

Owl

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