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Open Poetry #47
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steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058


0 posted 2011-03-02 04:21 PM



turning a phrase
until it rolls over
in its grave
determined
to assuage the thought-filters
of my mind
minding not
its course, nor cause

speaking volumes
of shelf-space
in the library
of consciousness
frozen
like cave-born
stalactites
tightly lording over
mites by might

well-spoken
in memory, but not
in time
always late
and never on the same
missing the fitting
that I so need
at times

and the words jam
in a cultural causeway
not misspoken
just unsaid
and I blame
a muse, amused
that I’ve never lost
the words with which
to complain

© Copyright 2011 Steaven R Snow - All Rights Reserved
OwlSA
Member Rara Avis
since 2005-11-07
Posts 9347
Durban, South Africa
1 posted 2011-03-02 05:15 PM


This is brilliant and each word is ‘le mot juste’ which is exactly the point of the poem.  I loved it, Steaven.

Owl

steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

2 posted 2011-03-03 01:16 AM


owl, thank you...of course, knowing (as you do) my level of French, I had to look it up just to understand your wonderful compliment
Marchmadness
Member Rara Avis
since 2007-09-16
Posts 9271
So. El Monte, California
3 posted 2011-03-03 02:07 PM


Very clver and well written, Steaven, Enjoyed.
                             Ida

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
4 posted 2011-03-03 04:10 PM


Very enjoyable reading Steaven, but all of your work is very enjoyable you have a wonderful vocabulary but you know how to use it wisely.

This piece is so true...
It seems that good news can turn into bad news and it never has good timing. As the words jam and jam again. Then your friends, meaning well, can over advise and promote some sort of silver lining that doesn't mesh with your thoughts.

It is what it is and you write it well here.
No one is really exempt.

Take care

Eric

true love never looks after it's own interests

faithmairee
Senior Member
since 2011-01-05
Posts 1441
Poe Haven, USA
5 posted 2011-03-03 04:32 PM


this is really great...nice work as always, steavenr

There must be a poem in here somewhere.

steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

6 posted 2011-03-03 10:18 PM


ida, thank you.  It is a style that I have read from others (and enjoyed) and just thought I would give it at least one try

Eric, thank you & my mother would thank you.  She convinced me as a kid that words were knowledge and vocabulary was at the top of the chart (she was a teacher)

Faith, thanks very much...it is appreciated

Honeybunch
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-29
Posts 7115
South Africa
7 posted 2011-03-04 03:17 AM


Oh, yes, well done, Steaven.  Brilliant ending and so true of all of us.

Helen

EmmaRose
Senior Member
since 2011-03-02
Posts 1376
Midwest
8 posted 2011-03-04 07:56 AM


Your grasp of vocabulary and content glows
in message of value.

2islander2
Member Ascendant
since 2008-03-12
Posts 6825
by the sea
9 posted 2011-03-04 11:31 AM


steaven r this is an excellent message and a very clever poem, my mother too was a teacher, a french teacher who loved book and litterature.....Thanks for the enjoyable read.

yann

steavenr
Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058

10 posted 2011-03-04 11:56 AM


Helen, thank you.  I am so glad you liked the ending…I changed it several times (not sure that others would want to identify with it)

EmmaRose, first...welcome to PiP.  I will have to look closer to see if I can find one of your writes, but in the meantime, thank you for your gracious compliment

yann, glad you found it enjoyable & thank you for commenting, but I do have a question (knowing you are from France)...was your mother a teacher of French, or a teacher in France?  just curious...

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
11 posted 2011-03-04 04:22 PM


I've had a love affair with words ever since I got my very first dictionary. I kept it at my bedside so that I could look up words when I read in bed. I enjoy your use of the English language and your brilliant turns of phrase. A clever and very interesting read, Steaven!


Linda

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