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Open Poetry #47

Battle cries

mikeandrew
Member

since 2010-11-18

Posts 198

0 posted 2011-01-22 09:09 AM

Thousands of brave troops shouting out battle cries,
storming the beach in swarms like an army of wasps
with razor-sharp steel bayonets lungeing, and thrusting,
piercing young men's dreams of love, for the earth
has swallowed them up and spits out their helmets
for head stone markers across the sands, like
turtle shells who came a shore to burry eggs
under the dark of night, glares of bursting bombs
with allusions of fourth of July barbeque's, a patriotic
stench of death fills the battle fields like incense
of smoke from cigarettes in our holy sanctuary
the trench the fox hole our hell.

[This message has been edited by mikeandrew (01-22-2011 09:51 AM).]

s1nfully_1nn0c3nt
Senior Member

since 2003-10-26

Posts 1105
Watertown, NY

1 posted 2011-01-22 09:13 AM

The battlefields of war, are always a tough place to be.

-Trina
You better believe that my sarcasm could piss a happy meal off.

Lori Grosser Rhoden
Member Patricius

since 2009-10-10

Posts 10202
Fair to middlin' of nowhere

2 posted 2011-01-22 11:17 AM

This is powerful to me because you describe the horror of war in images peaceful:
like
turtle shells who came a shore to burry eggs
under the dark of night,
the contrast of images hints at the indifference born of familiarity.
Lori

JerryPat
Senior Member

since 2010-10-30

Posts 1991
Louisiana/America

3 posted 2011-01-22 07:38 PM

Yep. War is pure hell, Mike.

~ Life is sexually transmitted ~

faithmairee
Senior Member

since 2011-01-05

Posts 1441
Poe Haven, USA

4 posted 2011-01-22 07:40 PM

war is hell and i hate it, but i love your poem...it is masterfully written...one of your best imho

Faith

There must be a poem in here somewhere.

XGarapanX
Senior Member

since 2008-06-19

Posts 1435
Antarctica

5 posted 2011-01-23 12:28 PM

This is really good writing.

·´~`·»Garapan«·´~`· "Look! Crumbs on his jacketses... Heeee took it!"

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

6 posted 2011-01-26 05:42 PM

Fine writing...James

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