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Open Poetry #45
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kindredspirit
Member
since 2009-05-19
Posts 156


0 posted 2009-09-12 12:27 PM


my ocean tastes like bitterness on a sunny day
an eye stinging quotient, calm beneath
the current of change and wishful thinking

while outlaw words and the scent of sacrificial
cliche drift, snag in the alabaster foam
of raging surf and forgiveness

seaweed gathered from windswept sand
heart strings nimbly woven, capture
renegade wishes from churning depths

but leave behind frail gleaming treasure
a wavering second just barely
visible above deep emerald torrents

dreamer's eyes crayoned our initials in the sky
fluent admiration of raw potential
as the tide swept away our footprint pearls.

© Copyright 2009 Kara Fohner - All Rights Reserved
BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
1 posted 2009-09-12 12:34 PM


This is so very well done.  I tend to see the ocean in all it's peace
and tranquility.  I love your take and descriptive choice of words.

Excellent poem~

Alison
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318
Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy!
2 posted 2009-09-12 01:56 AM


I love the ocean and you painted it beautifully in your poem.

Alison

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
3 posted 2009-09-12 06:57 AM


quote:
dreamer's eyes crayoned our initials in the sky
fluent admiration of raw potential
as the tide swept away our footprint pearls.


A wonderful thought, most beautifully expressed!

Great work really!

Love,
Margherita

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
4 posted 2009-09-12 09:48 AM


Loved this line..."dreamer's eyes crayoned our initials in the sky"...and thoroughly enjoyed it all...

j.

kindredspirit
Member
since 2009-05-19
Posts 156

5 posted 2009-09-12 09:11 PM


Thank you all very much!!
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