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Open Poetry #45
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What Will Mom Say?
| Open Poetry #45 |
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What Will Mom Say? |
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rachaelfuchsberger
since 2007-02-21
Posts 609Las Vegas, NV |
My brother just told me he’s gay And I’m proud of him in a big, big way And I’m scared in a big, big way You see, mom knows that I’m gay And mom doesn’t like that I’m this way And mom doesn’t know that he’s this way So will mom throw the blame my way? “Since you’re gay, he wants to be gay” “Your brother looks up to you in every way” What will mom say? I proud of my brother for coming out. I’m just scared of what it may bring about. Arana Darkwolf |
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| © Copyright 2009 Rachael Fuchsberger - All Rights Reserved | |||
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crosscountry83 Member
since 2009-07-30
Posts 345 |
really like the way it explains. I might tweak the words to make the meter fit just right. I like your perspective. Wish you the best. Rileigh |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
Rachael, I agree with Rileigh. This is an interesting poem and I'd love to see you tighten up the meter a bit. I think with your poem is worth it. Hope all has gone well. Alison |
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WTBAKELAR
since 2008-09-09
Posts 1089Utah, USA |
I would hope your worrying about your mothers oppinion means that you love her. I believe this love is deserved because she loves her children also, It may be hard for her to deal with her children's choices, but they are your choices to make. Parents and their children are never perfect, but love is a hard thing to ignore. YOU must live with the choices YOU make, and Mom can chose to accept or not. You both have choices, but don't stop loving your mom, if her choice is not the one you hoped for. People change. Opinions change. Good luck, (oh, check your spelling) Tracey. The answer is always NO, Until the question is asked. |
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rachaelfuchsberger
since 2007-02-21
Posts 609Las Vegas, NV |
Ok, so it's been edited for meter, but I'm not sure I got it completely right. I'll be posting again with a conclusion to this story. My brother just told me he’s gay I’m proud of him in a big way I’m scared of it in a big way You see, our mom knows that I’m gay And Mom don’t like that I’m this way And Mom don’t know that he's this way So will Mom throw the blame my way? “Since you're gay, he thinks he is gay” “He looks to you in ev’ry way” What thoughts will Mom choose to convey? I’m proud of him for coming out I’m scared of what may come about Arana Darkwolf |
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nakdthoughts Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200Between the Lines |
the first one was better...forget the meter, sometimes you just have to express what is needed. "Mom don't" isn't proper English If you want to keep the samemeter you could drop the "And" and use "doesn't" again.  M |
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