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Passions in Poetry

Getting Crushed

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crosscountry83
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since 07-30-2009
Posts 335


0 posted 08-01-2009 03:13 PM       View Profile for crosscountry83   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for crosscountry83

It's there, everyday,
lurking around the corner,
waiting for a mistake.

Wear the right clothes, it says
Be careful what you say.
Fit in with your friends.

We all know it doesn't
matter all that much
- in the end.

But the pressure is there,
Glaring from all sides.
Crushing us.

- Rileigh

[This message has been edited by crosscountry83 (08-01-2009 05:14 PM).]

© Copyright 2009 Rileigh - All Rights Reserved
Kaoru
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Member Elite
since 06-07-2003
Posts 3888
where the wild flowers grow


1 posted 08-03-2009 08:14 PM       View Profile for Kaoru   Email Kaoru   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kaoru

I was never one to enjoy any kind of pressure, and I'm pretty claustrophobic. So, in my experience, I chose to relieve the pressure by never letting it be in the first place. Shrug it off, let it go.

Enjoyed.
Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 08-27-2002
Posts 40647
Realms of Light


2 posted 08-03-2009 08:25 PM       View Profile for Earth Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Earth Angel's Home Page   View IP for Earth Angel

CC, giving into peer pressure can literally mess up a young person's life. Time and again I have seen what those pressures can do. It's not easy to stand strong and march to the beat of your own drum ~ but it is well worth it! ~ TO BE SURE!

You have addressed a very important issue here.


EA
Yoinn
Senior Member
since 08-16-2007
Posts 631
Michigan


3 posted 08-05-2009 08:11 PM       View Profile for Yoinn   Email Yoinn   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Yoinn's Home Page   View IP for Yoinn

Nice write here Rileigh. The pressure you write about here continues in some form or other through out ones life. It can take form in Religion, politics etc. The pressure to conform.
  Some small advise on the poem. You don't really reveal who "we" or "us" is to the reader. Perhaps another stanza or just a line with that in mind. Or make it intimate and say its you, that might work too... Just some thoughts my man..keep up the good writing.

Yoin
crosscountry83
Member
since 07-30-2009
Posts 335


4 posted 08-05-2009 09:51 PM       View Profile for crosscountry83   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for crosscountry83

Thanks so much for the advice.  To a seriously new writer, it helps a lot.  I really appreciate it.  Yeah, one tiny issue though.... I'm a girl, not a guy lol. Thanks again,

Rileigh
jwesley
Member Ascendant
since 04-30-2000
Posts 6414
Texas . . .


5 posted 08-05-2009 11:29 PM       View Profile for jwesley   Email jwesley   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for jwesley

never let it get to me...really didn't care what mold 'they' decided needed to be filled...had my own empties to take care of,

But you're right...so many more use it for every breath they take....

j.

My grand daughters name is Ryleigh...spelled with a 'Y' though....
crosscountry83
Member
since 07-30-2009
Posts 335


6 posted 08-06-2009 12:05 AM       View Profile for crosscountry83   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for crosscountry83

That's neat, I always though Rylee would be a cool name too.  

Rileigh
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