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Open Poetry #45
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betty in the eyes
| Open Poetry #45 |
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betty in the eyes |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast 
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she was sandals that made hello again sin sounds when she wiggled her foot in semi proper as if to avoid an imbroglio of introduction but her eyes had their hands in my pockets and she made my security feel more insecure as if I needed to frisk her intentions for weapons but then they were all quite obvious also ubiquitous is sexy only in some special packages and hers should have been designer deviled she said I had too much leather to claw through and acted like she was in a hurry to go nowhere before we even really got around to beginnings but then I noticed she was double park hearted _______________ daark (bikeknight) [This message has been edited by Dark Stranger (07-23-2009 09:33 AM).] |
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Margherita Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236Eternity |
I just feel as if I had received an injection of fuel ... my motor started with sounds of joy, ready to savor your adventures and thus create my own with renewed energy. W o n d e r f u l l y invigorating! Love, Margherita  |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
ms mar..thanks lady friend..it is a rush sometimes to just stop and not move.. |
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unboundpoetess Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477 |
whoa black betty but then they were all quite obvious also ubiquitous is sexy only in some special packages and hers should have been designer deviled That's really cool. H |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
Thanks ms UBP....maybe she will be back when she has time to watch the parking lot change seasons.. |
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BluesSerenade Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549By the Seaside |
but then I noticed she was double park hearted ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Groovy baby!!! |
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rachaelfuchsberger
since 2007-02-21
Posts 609Las Vegas, NV |
Dark, Sir, I greatly enjoyed this piece. Thank you. Arana Darkwolf |
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martiniat8 Senior Member
since 2003-06-21
Posts 897Prague, Bohemia, Czech Republic |
Really like this one, stranger |
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Newpoet Member
since 2008-05-16
Posts 72 |
I enjoyed your creative use of metaphors coupled with grammatical experimentation. My favorite part of this poem was the imagery which was conveyed through conceptions of her mannerisms, before you two could be introduced. |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
ms bluezy..thanks babe _____________ ms Rachael, thank you lady friend ________________ ms martinia, thank you so much... _____________ newpoet, thank you for the read and comments |
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pretty1 Junior Member
since 2009-03-13
Posts 22 |
but her eyes had their hands in my pockets and she made my security feel more insecure as if I needed to frisk her intentions for weapons .... but then I noticed she was double park hearted I really enjoyed this one! It left me with a lingering longing for this bike knight man. |
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Oklahoma Rose Senior Member
since 2008-02-28
Posts 1586Oklahoma USA |
Enjoyed reading! |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
ms pretty1, thanks babe...soon I think. ___________ OR, thank you so much |
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Alison
since 2008-01-27
Posts 9318Lumpy oatmeal makes me crazy! |
I just close my eyes and see this. A keeper for sure because it makes me smile. ali-san |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
thanks little one..you make me smile |
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inkedgoddess Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392Ohio |
I will take her double and quadruple you all over us both mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm sounds like Miller time |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
ms inki,,if only you were close enough to break. thanks babe |
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jbstillwater Member
since 2009-07-03
Posts 216Albuquerque, New Mexico |
Once again, you have blown me away with your incredible play on words. You have a way of writing that makes me think, "Oh, I am not going to get this one," when all of a sudden, there she is! Clear as light. Loved it! Jan |
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Dark Stranger Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631West Coast |
Ms jb, thanks lady friend, am glad you soak em til they leave a mark on your mind |
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