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Open Poetry #45
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viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.

0 posted 2009-06-22 06:06 PM


The space between your ribs
was clearly designed
to fit my scarred fingers
like liquid in a glass.

Your spine
moving and rolling,
surrounded by woman-muscle
and woman-flesh.

The space between tenderness
was clearly designed
for me and you
to make hazy pleasure memories.

Your strange and beautiful eyes
flicker with a moment's gasp
the flame ignites
and burns us both out.

But only for the night.


____________________________________________
You Don't Have to Inhale Cigars.


-P

Thirty bits of glass had become my teeth,
They were breaking each and every time I tried to speak.

[This message has been edited by viking_metal (06-23-2009 06:21 PM).]

© Copyright 2009 Paul Weisbrod - All Rights Reserved
moonbeam
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Member Elite
since 2005-12-24
Posts 2356

1 posted 2009-06-22 06:09 PM


I can't believe you are the same poet from the old CA days, you've improved beyond recognition.

This is a marvellous and enjoyable poem.

Thanks for posting.  

You should try your hand at this:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/series/poetryworkshop

SEA
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Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
2 posted 2009-06-22 06:15 PM


"The space between tenderness
was clearly designed
for me and you
to make hazy pleasure memories. "

clearly

love it Paul...

but the strange eyes part LOL reminded me of the cartoon movie, An American Tail, and he gives them the Crrrrrrazzzzy eye....
too awesome...

unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477

3 posted 2009-06-22 06:42 PM


Paul

Seriously diggin' you here.

Nice,
Heather

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
4 posted 2009-06-22 10:36 PM


Moonbeam... Thank you. I like to pretend I've become something of a Poet from time to time. How do I enter? It looks like this months thing is over?

My dear SEA... I LOVE THAT MOVIE... Oh, and thanks. A SPEE, A SPIE, A SPUH-DUH-DUH-DUH... AN ARACHNID!!

Unbound... Thank you so very much.   I'm really glad people are starting to take kindly to my poetry. I guess that means I'm getting better at the stuff.




Thirty bits of glass had become my teeth,
They were breaking each and every time I tried to speak.

brneyedgrly
Senior Member
since 2009-06-08
Posts 1125
nowhere and everywhere
5 posted 2009-06-22 11:04 PM


~wow, paulie...

is that the kind of stuff i would be missing out on by not coming to minnesota??

i may have to rethink this!   lol

~seriously  : )

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
6 posted 2009-06-22 11:36 PM


Thank you Brown Eyes. I'm glad you liked it.


-P


Thirty bits of glass had become my teeth,
They were breaking each and every time I tried to speak.

moonbeam
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2005-12-24
Posts 2356

7 posted 2009-06-23 04:05 AM


Yes Paul this month's is over.  The next challenge will be up in a few days time if they follow the usual format.  The standard is extremely high, several well know published poets have been doing it from time to time.



viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
8 posted 2009-06-23 06:00 AM


Cool, I'm under qualified then. Haha.

I'll give it a shot anyhow.  

Thirty bits of glass had become my teeth,
They were breaking each and every time I tried to speak.

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
9 posted 2009-06-23 01:50 PM



V_M

Your poetry is cool!
~ & HOT!!!

EA


viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
10 posted 2009-06-23 04:07 PM


Thanks very much, mademoiselle EA.


P

Thirty bits of glass had become my teeth,
They were breaking each and every time I tried to speak.

A Romantic Heart
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-03
Posts 5496
Forever In Your Heart
11 posted 2009-06-23 06:28 PM


I liked the title,
it caught my eye,
and then the poem,
just blew me away,
deep stuff!

~ARH

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
12 posted 2009-06-23 06:54 PM


Thanks a lot romantic lady. Glad you enjoyed it.

Thirty bits of glass had become my teeth,
They were breaking each and every time I tried to speak.

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