navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #45 » vines of eden hedged
Open Poetry #45
Post A Reply Post New Topic vines of eden hedged Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477


0 posted 2009-06-17 12:25 PM


you were moved by my soliloquy
but my stageless love was bright
so I fed you paleful lilies
in the gardens of my night

I tried to tongue the sequined rivers
as lonely fell from spaces
warmed you deep in chasmed orchid
soft hedged in eden places

the gypsy of you would not smell home
wombed sepulchral in my arms
this wicked fruit would not tempt
dripping ripe serpentine charms

the woman of me shook for wanting
the circles you traced weren't mine
drawing swords of edgeless echos
thorn pricked eyes bled words of vine

begging in the reverb of glances
we twined around each other

I grew into red chimera

you grew into another

H

© Copyright 2009 Heather - All Rights Reserved
LeeJ
Member Patricius
since 2003-06-19
Posts 13296

1 posted 2009-06-17 06:36 AM


amazingly beautiful...

the gypsy in you would not smell home...

boy that surely describes me when I was a bit younger...

really enjoyed this

Dark Stranger
Member Patricius
since 2001-03-19
Posts 13631
West Coast
2 posted 2009-06-17 07:03 AM


ms UBP...enjoyed the twine of this and how you leave the ends frayed just enough
brneyedgrly
Senior Member
since 2009-06-08
Posts 1125
nowhere and everywhere
3 posted 2009-06-17 07:51 PM


~oh, my...unbound, this is wonderful!  the images, the words...couln't pick just one part to like!  i am saving this and will come back to it again and again...thank you
unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477

4 posted 2009-06-17 10:40 PM


Lee
So glad you enjoyed. Nice to meet you here!

D
TY dear. I love it when you look.

brneyedgrly
Thank you so much! Appreciate you.

L,
Heather

BluesSerenade
Member Patricius
since 2001-10-23
Posts 10549
By the Seaside
5 posted 2009-06-17 11:04 PM


Your visuals are spell binding and the tale,  so mysteriously telling.

Brava, woman!!!

unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477

6 posted 2009-06-17 11:26 PM


Thank you so very much!
Appreciate your kind comments.

Heather

viking_metal
Senior Member
since 2007-02-02
Posts 1337
In a Jeep, Minnesota.
7 posted 2009-06-17 11:31 PM


wicked sweet.

-P

Thirty bits of glass had become my teeth,
They were breaking each and every time I tried to speak.

Margherita
Member Seraphic
since 2003-02-08
Posts 22236
Eternity
8 posted 2009-06-18 10:18 AM


Dear Heather, you are a wondrous poetess you know. You bring emotion and ... here ... deep insight in the nature of us humans. It all makes sense, there is this touch of melancholy, but you offered it in high quality expressions.

Love,
Margherita

unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477

9 posted 2009-06-18 08:32 PM


Oh P
yer such a sweetie. TY hon.

Dearest Margherita
your replies are always a treasure.TY.

L,
Heather

brneyedgrly
Senior Member
since 2009-06-08
Posts 1125
nowhere and everywhere
10 posted 2009-06-23 08:13 PM



the woman of me shook for wanting
the circles you traced weren't mine
drawing swords of edgeless echos
thorn pricked eyes bled words of vine

begging in the reverb of glances
we twined around each other

I grew into red chimera

you grew into another


~heather...can i just say that i've spent five minutes arguing with myself about my favorite part and changing my mind on what to quote...

i would have had to copy the whole thing...but i finally settled on this.  

i am in awe at how you master your words and at the pictures they paint...wow for the second time

: )

unboundpoetess
Member
since 2008-05-24
Posts 477

11 posted 2009-06-23 09:45 PM


You tint me blushful
browneyed lady!

Humble thanks for the treat of your second read,
Heather

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
12 posted 2009-06-23 10:32 PM


unboundpoetess - didn't know which verse I liked more, they were all spectacular...

BC

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 2002-11-19
Posts 7392
Ohio
13 posted 2009-06-24 08:26 AM


your poetry is lush and fertile in its heavenly earthiness
Chalmette Guy
Senior Member
since 2009-03-11
Posts 1257
Louisiana
14 posted 2009-06-24 08:38 AM


Heather, what more could I say that others here haven't? Loved this.
Wow.

HAZARD
Junior Member
since 2009-06-24
Posts 40
ENGLAND
15 posted 2009-06-24 10:01 AM


I read this over several times - each read rewards focus. I can never seem to grasp things whole - they splinter into me jagged and spine tingling.
Rich couplings like '... reverb of glances' waken me to thoughts - and poems yet unwritten.

Good stuff.

HAZARD

LindsayP
Member Elite
since 2007-07-28
Posts 3410
Australia, Victoria
16 posted 2009-06-24 10:06 PM



I tried to tongue the sequined rivers
as lonely fell from spaces
warmed you deep in chasmed orchid
soft hedged in eden places

That is quite a poem that you have written here my friend, a pleasure to read. The

word Eden caught my eye as our property
is named Eden.

Lindsay

Earth Angel
Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215
Realms of Light
17 posted 2009-06-25 11:10 AM


My word! You are one talented poetess! I do believe that my having just now enjoyed your poem three times, is a good indication that is a !!! ....SAVED!!!


EA

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #45 » vines of eden hedged

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary