Do not hang up on me!
Donít you dare!
Youíve walked away from her too many times!
Do you want to know what Iíve found?
Yes it is relevant!
I swear to God if you hang up onó
Will you just be quiet and listen to me!
Weíre talking about your daughter here!
No. She isnít eight years old.
No! Iím positive! She is fifteen!
No. No. I am 100 per cent sure that she is not eight!
Just listen! Please!
I want to read you somethingÖ
No it isnít one of her pretty songs!
She hasnít written them since she was seven!
She. Is. Fifteen.
I want to read you something she wroteó
I donít care if youíre busy!
She is your daughter for Christ sake!
She wrote this when she was ten and I wanted you to knowÖ
Iím about to tell you what!
Stop interrupting me!
I really miss you.
I go swimming every Saturday
If you want to come visit me
Mum wonít mind.
I cry myself to sleep each night because
You donít love me
Mum says you do but you donít even call for my birthday
I donít mind if you donít have any presents for me
I know you donít have much money
But the movies donít cost much money
I wonít get any popcorn
The park is free
We can pack sandwiches
I really miss you daddy
But I know you donít miss meÖ
I love you daddy
But I know you donít love meÖ
Is it Ďcause Iím ugly?
Is it Ďcause Iím dumb?
Is it Ďcause Iím fat?
I guess itís all three
Do not even think about hanging up!
She was ten years old when she wrote that!
And if you think anything has changed!
No I donít care that your new wife doesnít like her!
She. Is. Your. Daughter.
Why would I make this up?
I am insulted that you would even think that I wanted more money!
I despise you for making her feel this way!
Oh how do I know?
Okay, you wanna play 20 questions?
Has she ever had braces?
Nope. She has.
Okay next question!
What is her favourite colour?
Do you even know her? Itís red! Red! She hates pink!
Okay, back to basics,
What is her eye colour?
Oh. My. God.
Have you even met her?
You disgust me!
You are a disgusting, filthy creature who doesnít deserveó
Let me finish!
She is a wonderful daughter and you donít deserve that!
Oh grow a brain, get a heart and somewhere along the line acquire a spine!
FOR THE LAST TIME SHE IS NOT EIGHT YEARS OLD!!
My pen is the barrel of a gun. Remind me which side you should be on.