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 Teen Poetry #9
 I'm not ready
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Passions in Poetry

I'm not ready

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nehematala
Member
since 05-21-2009
Posts 129


0 posted 06-12-2010 01:36 AM       View Profile for nehematala   Email nehematala   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for nehematala


Tall grass
People passing by
Voices within
I say I'm not ready
And yet you move on

I say no
And you continue
I had no choice in the matter
You had it all planned out
Now my life is a mess
Shattered all around me

I have to keep myself together
For the life growing within
I have to be strong
I have to grow up
because you took my life
And gave me a new one
To look after

Tall grass
People passing by
Life within
I'm not ready
And now I have to be

I wrote this poem from a friends point of view, its not my best but its true.
© Copyright 2010 Michelle Lynn Barclay - All Rights Reserved
*tori_rose*
Junior Member
since 10-12-2010
Posts 44
Weber City, VA


1 posted 10-13-2010 11:53 AM       View Profile for *tori_rose*   Email *tori_rose*   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for *tori_rose*

i can totally relate to this as i have just broken up with someone because they were pushing me to do things that i didnt want to, i was one of the lucky ones that got out before  anything to bad happened
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


2 posted 10-13-2010 01:13 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine

It's not always easy to write from
another's perspective, but I believe
you did a good thing here; because
it is believable, and the compassion,
as a writer, comes through.

Prats
Member
since 12-16-2010
Posts 74


3 posted 12-17-2010 08:23 AM       View Profile for Prats   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Prats

i liked dis poem... it's touching...

Heaven is not that place where you go when you die... it's that time in your life when you actually feel ALIVE!!!

XGarapanX
Senior Member
since 06-19-2008
Posts 1416
Rekjavik Iceland


4 posted 01-02-2011 05:11 AM       View Profile for XGarapanX   Email XGarapanX   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit XGarapanX's Home Page   View IP for XGarapanX

Actually, the beauty of this piece is that it conveys the scene and the sense in very direct terms. This is not a subject which a person can, or perhaps even should, dress up poetically. The natural style with which you wrote this is plenty poetic without detracting at all from the subject and it's profound implications. Nor, do I feel, could a more dramatic conveyance have created such a poignant sensation as the one it does now, just as it is. So, I beg to differ, this is among your best because it does precisely what it needs to, no more, no less, and that balance is as much an art as flowery poetry.

·´~`·­»Garapan«­·´~`·
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