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Teen Poetry #9

Unfixable

Stitches
Member

since 2009-11-27

Posts 159
United Kingdom

0 posted 2010-05-17 05:49 PM

There's been a hole in your heart
From where you first began;
But I caught the bulletin,
And this is how it ran:

'I'm bleeding so help me,
I'm bruised green and blue,
And the only person who can help me-
Is little old you.'

I applied for the place,
I tried ever so hard.
But I could never quite find,
The missing shard.

I decided you hid it,
Along with the glue.
So the only person really-
Who can help is you.

'I feel like an animal, and I don't think that I get it. But one day I'll see you around.'

Leanne <3
Member

since 2007-08-25

Posts 216
N.S.W, Australia

1 posted 2010-05-17 07:40 PM

I got a little confused at first but when i read it again i loved it.
I've been looking for that missing shard for a long time.
-Lee

whisperingwalt
Member

since 2010-04-29

Posts 240
Coquitlam, BC, Canada

2 posted 2010-05-20 09:56 AM

very well done...depth with emotion...ww

Octave
Member

since 2008-07-29

Posts 186
Highlands, Scotland.

3 posted 2010-05-23 05:05 AM

This was nicely done. The whole 'hole in my heart' thing can be cliche and overdone but you pulled this off nicely and made it something different. Good write!

Stitches
Member

since 2009-11-27

Posts 159
United Kingdom

4 posted 2010-05-23 06:28 AM

Thanks

'I feel like an animal, and I don't think that I get it. But one day I'll see you around.'

freeand2sexy
Senior Member

since 2008-09-12

Posts 704
CA, USA

5 posted 2010-06-04 10:14 PM

Original and Amazingly AWEsome!!!

I loved it!

"When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car"
- Unknown

toriber
Junior Member

since 2010-06-10

Posts 22
texas

6 posted 2010-06-11 01:09 PM

it was great, veery deep

*love- cant live with it cant live without it*

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