How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Main Forums
 Teen Poetry #9
 Cracking The Looking Glass
 1 2 3 4 5
Follow us on Facebook

 Moderated by: Acies, Dopey Dope, SEA   (Admins )

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

Cracking The Looking Glass

 Post A Reply Post New Topic   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
Falling rain
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 01-31-2008
Posts 2165
Small town, Illinois


0 posted 09-30-2009 12:41 PM       View Profile for Falling rain   Email Falling rain   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Falling rain's Home Page   View IP for Falling rain

Hey guys. So this was just a random write after being inspired by several things as followed...

(Songs: Brick by Boring Brick by Paramore. If You Seek Amy by Britney Spears. Ghost of You by My Chemical Romance. Music Box by Regina Spektor.
Other thing: Alice in Wonderland.   )

Lol okay so that's a lot of things and I probably didn't use my inspirations to their full potential. Anyway here's my poem.   Hope you enjoy.

P.S I don't like the third stanza at all. So if you think of something better please tell.   Thanks.


-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Whisper a fairy tale
Build your invisable walls
Ignore all the pain and suffering,
The people waiting for you to fall  

Take down the memories
Throw them in the nearest lake
Smear your pretty make up darling
Draw on a smile oh so fake

Its a circle;
A cycle we all go through
Your life; a stage
An act we all see too

Whisper your tales
Hide your heart with magic
Watch it disappear honey!
That old life; so tragic

[This message has been edited by Falling rain (10-05-2009 05:43 PM).]

© Copyright 2009 Zach Booker-Scott - All Rights Reserved
XxForever.BrokenxX
Senior Member
since 01-20-2008
Posts 887
Neverland


1 posted 09-30-2009 08:10 PM       View Profile for XxForever.BrokenxX   Email XxForever.BrokenxX   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for XxForever.BrokenxX

This would sound really good as a song if you could think of something a bit more fitting for the third stanza. It kinda reminds me of Everybody's Fool (evanescence) actually. But anyhoo, great write. Sorry I don't have any title suggestion :\

{~~*~~}

EmilyTheStrange
{~~*~~}
...popsicle!

hunnie_girl
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 06-18-2006
Posts 2539
Canada


2 posted 10-01-2009 12:41 AM       View Profile for hunnie_girl   Email hunnie_girl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for hunnie_girl

wow Zack i love this
precious pearls
Member
since 07-24-2009
Posts 110
NJ; United States


3 posted 10-04-2009 04:46 PM       View Profile for precious pearls   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for precious pearls

How about:
It's a cycle that never ends
A circle that never opens
Whether it be occasionally or in stages
It never ceases

I can't think of a title though, if i come back to it, i'll let you kno

BTW, Great poem, very insightful and full of truths!

Always,
   Kai (a.k.a. precious pearls)

priyanka
Member
since 06-15-2009
Posts 212
india


4 posted 10-04-2009 04:52 PM       View Profile for priyanka   Email priyanka   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for priyanka

gr8 poem..reminds me a lot of myself...
btw kai has realli cool idea for the thrid stanza...
she did great...
Assassin_of_Verse
Member
since 10-23-2007
Posts 330
that So Cal


5 posted 10-04-2009 10:43 PM       View Profile for Assassin_of_Verse   Email Assassin_of_Verse   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Assassin_of_Verse

How about:

"Cracking the Looking Glass"

or

"Filling the Rabbit Hole"

There is power in the pen.

 
 Post A Reply Post New Topic   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Main Forums >> Teen Poetry #9 >> Cracking The Looking Glass Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors